First of all, I love NutritionData.com like Perez Hilton loves a starlet meltdown. ND is especially useful because you can do a very detailed nutrient search (check under “Tools”). If you’re curious about which foods are higher in, say, the amino acid valine, ND is your all-knowing guru.

Second, here’s a little chart that might be helpful. Here are common foods that are good sources of the major nutrients. Remember, whole foods are usually combinations of nutrients — most foods have a bit of everything. For example, I’ve filed beans and high-protein grains such as quinoa under “carbs” because their carbohydrate content outweighs their protein content. Nuts and nut butters go under “fat” for the same reason, although they also contain protein.

Now let’s look at some sample meals that combine these three groups. I’ve given you some ideas from various cuisines.

If you’re controlling your carbohydrate intake, simply eliminate things like noodles and grains and minimize fruit in favour of vegetables. Note also that I’ve listed some vegetables as carb sources, but again, except for the coloured root vegetables (carrots, yams), other tubers (potatoes, taro), and squash, they’re mostly just vitamins, fibre and water.

Ideally, vegetables should form the largest proportion of your meals. So, for instance, in your East Asian stir-fry, opt for something like 75%-80% vegetables (by volume), 4-6 ounces of protein (about the size of the palm of your hand or a deck of cards), a sparing sprinkle of nuts or sesame seeds, and a small serving of noodles (optional). Some nutritionists use the “plate method” to describe this: imagine half your plate is vegetables, one-quarter is protein, and one-quarter is the carbohydrate portion. Personally I suggest that folks view starchy carbohydrates as a condiment and include about the same amount they’d use for other condiments such as salsa. Again, in general, the bulk of your carbohydrates should generally be consumed around exercise, either before or after.

• (Thai) Beef, chicken or shrimp curry with coconut milk and vegetables (served over brown rice if desired)
• (South Asian) Same deal as Thai, except different curry seasonings and a side of cucumber in yogurt or carrot chutney, or a mango lassi (mango whipped with yogurt)
• (Greek or Middle Eastern) Roasted meat, poultry, seafood or tempeh with roasted zucchini, eggplant, and peppers brushed with a little olive oil, with a side of chickpea hummus or even straight tahini (sesame butter)
• (East Asian) Vegetables and protein of choice stir-fried with a little olive oil, served over soba (buckwheat) noodles, topped with a sprinkle of sesame seeds or crushed almonds
• (Italian) Grilled rabbit with whole wheat pasta in a tomato sauce and side of rapini tossed with a little olive oil
• (French) Nicoise salad with fish, boiled egg, green beans, salad greens and Dijon vinaigrette
• (German) Turkey sausage with red cabbage braised in a little olive oil and apple-vinegar sauce
• (Southern US) Pork tenderloin or turkey breast stuffed with apples, served with wild rice and squash, and a side of collard greens, topped with a sprinkle of chopped walnuts or pecans
• (Southwestern US) Chili made with beef, turkey, and/or beans (which in a vegetarian version count as the protein), served with guacamole and tomato salsa
• (California) Seafood served over greens, avocado and grapefruit, tossed with a vinaigrette
• (Korean) Bi bim bap: grilled beef or tempeh mixed with vegetables, served over brown rice with a cooked omega-3 egg on top
• (East African) Doro wat (chicken stew) with sauteed greens atop injera (teff flatbread) or with lentil stew; niter kibbeh (spiced butter) made with coconut oil
• (Indigenous Canadian) Grilled salmon (has omega-3 fatty acids) with wild rice; side of blueberries or stewed cranberries
• (Indigenous US) Wild game (has a good omega-3 fatty acid profile) with corn and beans; tomato salad
• (Latin American) Squash soup topped with pepitas (pumpkin seeds) and a side of grilled fish
• (Caribbean) Jerk chicken with pigeon peas, greens, and coconut

1. Fat is a relationship, not a thing. Well, body fat is indeed a thing: as I mentioned in part 1, fat is a substance with a definable structure and properties. But it’s more than that. For women (and many men), the idea of “fat” creates a relationship between how we perceive ourselves and how we interact with the world around us. So, an 80-lb. anorexic sees herself as “fat”, an average-sized 150 lb. woman sees herself as “fat”, and a 300 lb. woman sees herself as “fat”. When bodybuilders are on stage, and they aren’t lean enough, someone will invariably say, “S/he’s fat”, which doesn’t mean, “That person resembles a premenstrual walrus”, but rather, “That person has failed to meet the aesthetic and body composition requirements of this activity”. In other words, context is everything. What we call “fat” is socially defined, and may have little basis in what is “really” fat. I think this point is important to recognize because it indicates how arbitrary our judgements can be about what is fat, and how we value fat in ourselves and others. Fat, then, becomes a dynamic between us and our culture, rather than a possession that we have or do not have.

2. Separate body fat from value. It’s pretty clear that fat = bad in our culture. What I’m suggesting is that we re-think the inherent value we give to fat, and understand it instead as something which is important to have in the right quantities. Some people are tall, some people are short, some have brown eyes, some have blue eyes, some people have more body fat, and some people have less body fat. That’s the way it is. Ideally body fat should have no more positive or negative associations than other indicators of health and fitness. Having more body fat should not be correlated with stupidity, laziness, slovenliness, etc. Rather, body fat should be viewed as merely another physical feature which varies individually. If you choose to reduce your body fat, don’t view it as a moral issue. Think of it like a haircut or clipping your toenails: you’re simply decreasing the amount of a physiological component, not embarking on a religious crusade. Knowing your body fat should be like knowing your shoe size. It’s just a number. If you want to change that number, go ahead and do it. But you’re not a better person if you’re X% rather than Y%.

3. To build on #2, people have naturally varying levels of body fat. Human biodiversity is normal and desirable. Assuming that naturally skinny people are inherently healthier and fitter is a mistake. While there is a healthy range of body fat levels, above or below which is associated with negative health consequences, it is a range, not a single number. Some women may look and feel cruddy at 15%, while others may be happy and healthy. Same with 30%. Body fat is not the only variable of fitness or health, and there are many women with much higher body fat levels than me who can outlift me, outrun me, and generally kick my ass. Each person ideally has a level of body fat which is appropriate to their genetics, gender, age, training goals, and general state of health. Fitness and fatness are not incompatible.

4. Don’t participate in fat-negative behaviour. I know of parents who put healthy, growing children on diets or force them to do exercise (I don’t mean fun exercise, I mean deliberate anti-fat, post-meal aerobic type exercise) so that their tiny tots will not suffer the horror of excess adipose tissue. Forcing your child to preventively diet and exercise is probably the surest way to make sure they have messed up eating habits and body image for life. Don’t tie acceptance of a person to their body fat levels. I’ve met some lean people who were unbelievably dysfunctional about their health and their bodies in general. And spare me all the excuses about how it’s okay to crap on people with more body fat because we’re biologically inclined to prefer slenderness. That’s just a little too close to saying it’s okay to exterminate people who aren’t genetically ideal. It’s not okay to bash people because of a physiological feature, and it’s not okay to participate in paranoia about body fat with someone who is vulnerable.

5. You can both critique the health problems associated with excess body fat, and be positive about each person’s right to control their own body. Separate these two issues. I don’t like many of the options for hormonally based contraception, but I would never tell another woman that she shouldn’t choose it for herself. I prefer to keep my body fat a bit lower than the average, and that is my choice. My female training partners have ranged in body fat from 18% to 29%, and all have been active, healthy women who were quite satisfied where they were.

6. It is irrefutable that higher levels of body fat, above a particular range, and particularly visceral fat (aka deep tummy fat) are clearly correlated with health problems: joint pain, Type II diabetes and insulin resistance, breathing difficulties, etc. However there are many other things which are correlated with health problems: drinking to excess, smoking, inactivity, stress, getting dealt a crappy hand in the genetic poker game, and so on. Body fat is one variable of many. Excess body fat can indeed signify inactivity, poor nutrition, eating problems, and underlying medical conditions such as polycystic ovarian syndrome. Excess body weight can put mechanical stress on tissues, and is directly responsible for some medical conditions. Body fat secretes hormones and cell signals, and participates actively in the body’s hormonal environment. But body fat in and of itself does not necessarily cause all the health problems; rather, poor nutrition and lifestyle habits, and lack of adequate activity are also major culprits.

7. You are not a prisoner of your body fat. Fat has no inherent value other than what we attach to it. You are a prisoner of your mind and spirit. If you feel imprisoned by your body fat, look deeper to examine the issues which you have that are associated with it. And don’t give your body fat the status of a sentient being. You have control, to some degree, over your body composition. While the end range of what you can achieve is limited by your genetics, nearly everyone without some bizarre metabolic disorder can achieve and maintain a level of body fat which is healthy and ideal for them. I don’t mean this to get all individualist here, because we should certainly continue to be critical of the bullshit social ideal of thinness which we’re all supposed to emulate, but you have the power to enable your body to make positive changes.

8. Everything has its place. Body fat is there for a reason. You need it. It does good things for you. It enables your reproductive system to be functional, it helps regulate hormones, and it serves as an indicator of “body happiness” (to your body, excessive leanness = starvation = stress = bad). It makes you lovely and curvy, makes it comfortable to sit, makes it nice for someone to snuggle you (nobody wants to hug a xylophone). It’s an important part of your body, so give it its due.

When calculating fat loss it is best to combine numeric weight loss with the percentage of body fat. This is done because numeric weight (i.e. the weight on the scale) does not give us the full picture of how much of a person is fat and how much is LBM. If we take two people who are 200 lbs., and one of them is our 20% body fat person, and the second is someone with 10% body fat, clearly the second person is in better shape. However, judging this by the scale alone would be misleading.

Many athletic people are “overweight” by the standards of scale weight, but still fit and lean, because muscle is much denser than fat. This is why the conventionally used body mass index (BMI) is a poor tool of assessment for athletic people. I have known several people who got in trouble from doctors, military bosses, etc. for being overweight, when the assessor could clearly observe that they were muscular and lean. Frankly, I’ll be happy when they junk that stupid BMI thing in favour of body composition tests, and I’m not just saying that because I’m pushing “overweight” myself.

(On the other hand, many folks delude themselves about how “fit” they are. Yeah, muscle is denser than fat, but be honest with yourself. Unless you’re someone who hits the gym 5 days a week, there’s a good chance the BMI applies to you. Sorry.)

To give you an idea of how body fat assessment can be used to establish changes in body composition, let’s say that we have a 200 lb. person who begins a fitness program at 30% body fat. That means she has 60 lbs. of body fat and 140 lbs. of LBM. Let’s then say that she gets to 160 lbs. and 20% body fat. Now she has 32 lbs. of body fat, and 128 lbs. of LBM. Some LBM has been lost in the process, but it’s only 12 lbs. worth, whereas 28 lbs. of body fat has been lost.

Let’s say in a second example that our 200 lb. person hasn’t been training or eating right, and manages to get down to 160 lbs. through a combo of chain smoking, black coffee, and long hours of low intensity, endurance-based cardio. However, because of her poor training and eating habits, she’s only made it down to 25% body fat. This means she’s lost 20 lbs. of fat and 20 lbs. of muscle.

Person 1: 160 lbs, 20% body fat. 32 lbs fat, 128 lbs LBM.

Person 2: 160 lbs, 25% body fat. 40 lbs fat, 120 lbs LBM.

Same finishing weight, big difference in results. The second person will probably look and feel worse, will not be as lean, and most importantly, will not have the all-important LBM that keeps the metabolic fires stoked. The second person will likely put that 40 lbs. right back on in the long run. The first and second people are the same numeric weight, but their body composition will be significantly different.

Having argued in favour of body fat assessment, I should caution you that the tools of body fat assessment vary wildly in their accuracy and ease of use. In general, it’s a sad truth that the easier the body fat measurement, the more inaccurate it’s likely to be. Body fat calculations are based on population norms, which at the time many of the calculations were developed, meant white male college students (they were easy to get hold of for university lab research, which, by the way, is another reason to critically read scientific studies that use this as a normative population). Athletes, people of nonwhite backgrounds, older folks, basically anyone outside of that “norm” can get an inaccurate reading. There are apocryphal stories, for example, of black athletes getting negative body fat percentage readings (this means, perhaps, that they actually give body fat to the people around them?). I’ve heard people claim to be 4% body fat because their tape measurement said so, and I usually tell them that if they’re 4%, then:

a) they should see horizontal striations (ridges) on the muscles in their ass;
b) they should be covered in visible veins (not just a few);
c) they should be able to see the lymph nodes in their groin;
d) unless they’re a competing bodybuilder about to go on stage, their family is probably booking their funeral.

Here’s a rundown of ways to measure body fat, from easiest and most inaccurate to hardest and most precise.

Tape measurements of body circumference (e.g. waist, hips) combined with height/weight measurements are unbelievably inaccurate. Just for fun, I tested a few of the online tape measurement calculators, and got results ranging from 12% to 28% body fat. Tape measurements are handy for knowing overall size losses or gains, but are largely useless for knowing body fat.

Bioelectrical impedance devices, such as the Tanita body fat scale, determine body fat by sending little electrical pulses through the body. Not bad for average people, usually quite inaccurate for athletic people. Measurements will also vary significantly based on hydration levels. Still a margin of error in the range of +/- 5%, and there’s a big difference between 10% and 15%.

Skinfold calipers take a pinch of skin at various sites on the body. This is more accurate if it’s done by someone experienced, but there is still a margin of error of around 2-3%. If you want to assess your own body fat, this is probably the best way to do it as long as you remember that you need practice, and the margin of error remains significant.

Hydrostatic, or underwater weighing, requires the person to be submerged in a tank of water and to expel all the oxygen from their lungs as they are measured. This is quite accurate but hard to obtain unless you live near a friendly university research lab.

DEXA, or dual energy x-ray absorptiometry, is likewise accurate but also involves a complex procedure with special equipment. However, if you’re going for a DEXA bone density scan, see if you can sneak in a body fat assessment while you’re there.

Autopsy is the most accurate and effective means of body fat assessment. And, guess what, it’s a little inconvenient for most of us.

I actually didn’t mention the one method that’s both easy and potentially very accurate: visual inspection by a trained eye. People who’ve been in the bodybuilding biz long enough, and who are sufficiently observant, can tell someone’s body fat just by looking at them. I can take a pretty decent guess, but no doubt there are bodybuilding veterans who have the incisive visual accuracy of autopsy. You don’t need to be a bodybuilding pro to do this yourself, though. Sometimes the best tool for assessing your body fat is a full length mirror and an overhead light. Look at yourself from all angles. Observe any visible muscle definition: the “v” of the deltoids at the top of the arm, the lumps of the ab muscles, the ridge under the calf. Observe also where you deposit your fat: breasts, belly, upper arms, waist, hips, thighs, lower back. If you like, take pictures every month or few months, and use them for a visual comparison of body fat gains or losses. Familiarizing yourself with your individual body fat patterns will help you see changes in your body composition. This exercise is meant to be simple observation only, not judgement.

body fat norms

Normal and ideal ranges for body fat vary with gender. On average, women have a higher body fat than men. At one extreme, male bodybuilders before a contest can drop their body fat to around 4-5%, while women can drop to around 6-7%, commonly with the assistance of drugs. Female fitness competitors are usually in the range of 10-14%, depending on the aesthetic of whatever it is they’re posing for (e.g. swimsuit, onstage, fitness shoots, etc.). These very low body fat percentages are generally maintained for only a short period, normally before a photo shoot or contest. Very low body fat percentages are extremely difficult to maintain for most people, since the body has metabolic and hormonal mechanisms in place to prevent what it perceives as a shortage of available resources.

For general health and fitness, for men, somewhere between 10-15% is a good range to shoot for, though the North American average is undoubtedly higher. Men who want to see a six-pack of abs usually have to be under 10-11% to do so, since that’s normally where they store fat. For women, 20-25% is the approximate ideal for general health. Athletic women may keep their body fat as low as the mid-teens with no ill effects, since energy balance (calories in versus calories out) is the prime determinant of health in this case. While low body fat is correlated with problems common to elite female athletes, such as disordered or absent menstruation and loss of bone density, it is not a particular body fat percentage per se which is responsible. Rather, since low body fat is often correlated with a negative energy balance (in other words, taking in fewer calories than one burns), it can appear as if body fat levels alone are responsible. A lean woman who is careful to adequately meet her nutritional and caloric needs, and not overtrain, should see no detrimental effects from lower than average body fat.

For men, anything over 20% approaches obese territory, while for women this percentage is closer to 30% and over. Folks who have been overfat for a long time, particularly if they were overfat as children, will find it more difficult to drop to the lower end of the body fat range. One piece of good news, however, at least for pear shaped people, is that gynoid fat deposition is associated with fewer adverse health effects than android fat deposition. So, women with a gynoid fat pattern can carry a bit more fat with fewer consequences than the android folks (sorry, but that’s biology for ya).

I usually hover in the range of 15-18%, depending on the way I’m training, and my training goals. Once I start getting to around 15%, people start to tell me that my face is looking fuglier than normal. (Heehee.) For gaining strength and mass, it appears that a slightly higher body fat percentage is ideal. As always, an ideal body fat percentage for you will depend on many individual things: gender, age, overall health and medical conditions (including supplementation with hormones), starting body fat levels, and training goals.

I should mention briefly that insulin plays a significant role in this process, because it facilitates the storage of fat and inhibits its release. Think of insulin as that crazy old cat lady down the street who’s a total pack rat and saves old newspapers and empty peanut butter jars and bits of string, and goes around on garbage day seeing what she can salvage. Insulin has been receiving a lot of attention in recent years for its role in body fat accumulation. It used to be thought that there was a rather simple relationship between dietary fat and body fat (makes sense if you like things to be literal). If we didn’t eat fat, we thought we wouldn’t be fat, though inexplicably many of us (okay, me) got squishy while eating fat-free fig newtons and plain pasta.

It became clear that overall energy balance, or calories in versus calories out, was the most important determinant of body fat gain or loss, but our macronutrient ratio, or the percentages and types of carbs, fat, and protein, was also important. People who gave some attention to the role of insulin in their bodies were often more likely to lose fat and keep it off more effectively. Additionally, current research suggests that eating certain types of dietary fat can actually help keep you lean. Physiology is a head-scratcher sometimes.

Body fat is stored in two places in the body: subcutaneously, or under the skin, and viscerally, or around the internal organs. Visceral fat is much easier to mobilize (lose) than subcutaneous fat, although it increases with age. This age-dependent increase in visceral fat is why body fat calculators should factor in your age: two people with the same skinfold (subcutaneous fat) measurements might have much different overall levels of body fat because of the contribution of visceral fat to the equation. In other words, even if Grandma and little Suzy have the same level of subcutaneous fat, Grandma will likely have more overall body fat because she’ll have much more visceral fat.

Where we store fat is primarily dependent on genetics and hormones. So, if your mother was an apple shape with big boobs and belly, then you’ll likely be too. If mom was a pear with more fat on hips and thighs, then you’ll likely be described, as I was once, as “An hourglass with most of the sand at the bottom”. In general terms, midsection fat gain over the abs, obliques, and lower back is more associated with men, and is referred to as an android (male-pattern, not robot) fat deposition pattern. Lower body fat gain on hips, thighs, and on the tummy below the navel is more associated with women, and is referred to as a gynoid fat deposition pattern. However, there is significant crossover in these patterns, and these patterns can change with age and shifting hormone levels.

When fat is lost, it follows the pattern of fat deposition set out by your genetics and hormones. This means that where you put on fat first is where you lose it last. I think this point is important to emphasize, because it directly contradicts the myth of spot reduction. Barring physical or chemical intervention (e.g. liposuction, hormones), you cannot choose where your body wants to lose or store fat. I think that point is worth some big bold text:

There is no such thing as spot reduction.

All the leg lifts in the word will not change you from J. Lo to Twiggy . It doesn’t matter how hard you try, your body has a plan and it doesn’t like to deviate from it. You may also notice that in the process of losing body fat, fat is lost disproportionately, so that if you’re pear shaped, if you manage to get your hips and thighs skinny enough to do heroin chic modeling, your face will end up looking like it’s been vacuum-sealed in Death Valley and your chest will be flatter than a pool table in Saskatchewan. Competing bodybuilders or fitness competitors about to go on stage look like they’ve just gotten out of POW camps. Some women even get so lean that you can see the top ridge of their breast implants. The effect is minimized on film, but terrifying in person. The negative appearance of very low body fat will also be compounded by age.

What we tend to call “toning” or “definition” simply refers to a loss of body fat so that the muscle underneath may be more clearly seen or felt. There is nothing special about toning or definition. It is not a mystical or special process, one which is restricted to women or a particular workout protocol. It’s a loss of body fat, plain and simple.

Body fat loss also tends to be an imprecise process, in that the body likes to also jettison muscle tissue along with fat (conversely, when muscle mass is gained, some fat mass usually is as well). This varies, however, with how the fat is lost, how much fat is lost, and the starting point of fat loss. If there is a great deal of fat to lose then the percentage of loss which is lean tissue is likely to be less. If fat is being lost by a person who is already at a low body fat, then more muscle relative to fat is consumed.

This loss of muscle is one reason why bodybuilders who wish to compete at extremely low levels of body fat use drugs: it’s hard to get super lean without losing a lot of good stuff too. This is also why it is essential to get sufficient protein and engage in weight training while losing fat, so that the maximum amount of lean muscle tissue is retained. One study which I saw years ago showed that women who were put on equal diets (same amount of calories) lost the same amount of numeric weight (i.e. scale weight in pounds), but the group of women who was weight training wound up with much lower body fat than the sedentary group. Some members of the sedentary dieting group even wound up with more overall body fat as a percentage than they had started with, indicating that there was substantial muscle loss as a result of the dieting.

Thus it is important to stress that weight loss does not equal body fat loss, and vice versa. If being leaner is our goal, we must focus on body fat loss, not on numeric weight.

The words can send otherwise rational women into fits of paranoia and hushed, ashamed discussion of their failures. Years ago, I asked for a fitness assessment at my university gym. They offered a “lifestyle management package” which would measure body fat and fitness levels, offer nutritional counselling, and suggest an exercise program. Since I was already training and eating my veggies, all I really wanted to know was my body fat. I asked if this was possible. The woman behind the counter gave me a shocked look which was faintly admiring. “Wow”, she breathed, “You’re really brave.”

I gave her a puzzled smile. “It’s just a number”, I said. She widened her eyes at this brazen display of sangfroid.

Then I met with the woman who did the “lifestyle management” assessment, and explained to her that I just wanted my body fat measured. “We don’t really do that on its own”, she said.

This seemed confusing to me. Upon inquiry she explained that they avoided doing body fat assessments in isolation from nutritional and lifestyle counseling. A noble goal, of course, but one which was a bit frustrating to someone who just wanted a number. Asking to know my body fat was treated with the same quiet horror as a request to stuff and bronze my husband upon his demise. I pestered her until she begrudgingly said she would call the person who did the assessment and get back to me. Of course she never did. My theory is that the university calipers were in a bulletproof glass case, the two keys to which were hung around the neck of an army general and the President of the Yewnited States, played of course by Harrison Ford and not that weasely Ben Affleck (why a US president if this was Canadian? indulge this image, if you will, Tom Clancy fans).

What is it about body fat that inspires such fear and loathing? Fat is associated in our culture with undesirable qualities, particularly for women (I saw a guy at my gym the other day wearing a t-shirt that said, “It’s not a beer belly, it’s a gas tank for a sex machine”; imagine women wearing something comparable). Body fat, or at least the reduction of it through supplementation, diet, exercise, and surgery, is also a big industry. At this point, any discussion of body fat is not only rife with cultural anxieties, but also misconceptions and half-truths.

So, dear readers, since you know I never shy away from laying it on you with forthrightness and painful honesty, let’s talk about fat. Before you read any further, though it might be helpful for you to say that dirty f-word (no, not feminism) a few times to relieve it of its power to frighten you. Fat. Fat. Fat. Fatfatfatfatfatfaaaaat!

what is body fat?

Fat is a form of body tissue composed of cells which primarily store lipids (fatty acids and related compounds). These cells are embedded in a matrix of connective tissue. Fat cannot become muscle, and muscle cannot become fat, any more than your leg can become your arm. They are two entirely different types of tissues.

There are two types of fat tissue: brown adipose tissue (BAT) and white adipose tissue. Humans, unlike many other mammalian species who hibernate and/or require the specialized body temperature regulation that BAT provides, have mostly white adipose tissue (this is one reason why it’s hard to generalize animal data to humans).

Fat has many purposes: insulation, cushioning, fuel stores, and a source of estrogen production. Contrary to what you might think, your body does not have body fat because it’s trying to ruin your life. Rather, your body has fat because it’s trying to keep you alive as long as possible. Because of its composition, fat is an excellent and energy-efficient fuel source.

In general, we have a certain number of fat cells which remain more or less constant throughout our adult lives, if we maintain a roughly ideal weight for the duration. However, fat cells can also multiply if the body decides there is a need for them (for example, if you eat many more calories than your body can immediately use, over a long period of time, especially as a child), and then once you have them, they usually don’t go away unless you physically remove them (i.e. through a process such as liposuction). There is a process known as apoptosis, or “cell death”, which does occur with the administration of particular substances, or with illnesses such as HIV. However, at the moment, the bulk of the research has been performed on animals, so we cannot yet apply this to healthy humans who just want their fat cells to drop dead already so they can fit into that ugly bridesmaid’s dress by June.

Fat cells are kind of like little balloons that can be inflated or deflated (and they actually look sort of like a bunch of little balloons all squished together by connective tissue). When fat is “lost”, the little balloons just deflate, but they’re still there. “Cellulite”, by the way, is not a special kind of fat, but merely an effect of the fat’s position with regard to the connective tissue, and this depends largely on where the fat is, as well as age, gender, and genetics. Treatments that claim to reduce cellulite achieve a temporary tightening of the skin which gives the appearance of cellulite reduction for a brief time. As far as I’m concerned, “cellulite” is a word invented by an industry that has created a “problem” and wants to make money off the “solution” (notice that the word “cellulite” is usually accompanied by words like “revolutionary product” and “targeted fitness program” and “easy payments of only $19.95″).

In Part 2 of this article, I explain more about how gaining and losing body fat works.

Cottage cheese nutrient analysis per 120 g serving (1% fat version):
Energy: 99 cal
Protein: 16 g
Fat: 1.2 g
Carbohydrate: 6.0 g

Many weightlifters badmouth cottage cheese, whining that it tastes bad and can’t be used in any recipes. I henceforth declare them crybabies. To overlook cottage cheese is to do without a great source of lean protein and a versatile food.

Thus, I have made it my mission to convert the heathen.

High in protein, low in fat, easily available even in the crummiest dive of a convenience store, and great as a substitute for higher-fat cheeses or in its own right, cottage cheese is truly the food of the gods. Try a few of these (and send me any that you might have) and see if you can’t bring CC into your life too.

A disclaimer: I’m a seat-of-the-pants cook and my quantities are often instinctive. The amounts I have given are just suggestions, since I rarely measure things when I cook. Since I’m assuming we lifters all have our own weird diets, most of these are for one person. Adjust amounts accordingly for more.

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cottage cheese nachos fat free cottage cheese lean or extra lean ground beef) some tomaotes/green peppers or salsa some tostito low fat baked sour cream and cheese tortilla chips Combine all ingredients and you have some healthy nachos! They are awesome, high in protein, low in carb and fat…. try to get as much as possible from the cottage cheese (cottage cheese is the sour cream substitute) and as little as possible from the chips… also, try cottage cheese mixed with microwaved garbanzos and add 1 packet of Equal….. cottage cheese and “tasteless tuna” Also, try this discovery: if you boil tuna for 2 minutes in water, it loses about 80-90% of that nasty tuna taste! Just don’t eat it hot. Pour cool water over it and drain it so that it is cool and dry and it is almost tasteless! Mix it with cottage cheese and Equal and garbanzo beans and it is perfect! —Jeff Ward My favourite breakfast consists of cottage cheese and other stuff. It’s taken from one of the Zone recipe books. Anyway here it is: 1/2 cup cottage cheese 1/4 cup plain yogurt 1 cup of frozen blueberries (big plump ones, not pale little ones) 1/3 cup of unsweetened applesauce 1/2 teaspoon of nutmeg or more to your liking 1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon, again to your liking 4 teaspoons of slivered or sliced almonds 1) put the cottage cheese and yogurt in a bowl 2) blend the blueberries (can be misc frozen fruit if market doesn’t have any) with the applesauce 3) put the blueberry mix into the above bowl 4) put the nutmeg and cinnamon in the bowl 5) mix it all up 6) dust top with almonds Delicious! —Lyndsey Ferguson I’ve just got one Cottage cheese recipe. I love it and eat it every day. Just take Cottage chesse and add 3 tsp of sugar and 2 tsp of cocoa for every cup. I think it’s better than chocolate milk and doesn’t have much more sugar. —Chris Gold I love cottage cheese too, and have been enjoying a crazy recipe which I saw on your page for some time now (Chris Gold’s recipe, above). I can’t believe someone else likes this! I call it “chocolate cheese” and it grosses everybody out! She suggests sugar, but I think it tastes great with 2 packets of equal. You can also add 1/2 tsp vanilla extract if you wanna make it extra yummy. It tastes like chocolate cheesecake!! Another thing I love, love, love is equal parts store bought salsa and cottage cheese as a dip for fat free tortilla chips. This is awesome! I call it “Salsa Con Cottage Queso” and I made it up while living in Texas, feeling sorry for myself while missing out on all that yummy tex-mex. I can eat it just plain with a spoon!! I take thin sliced turkey (you know, lunch meat style) lay it out flat, put in some cottage cheese, and pickle, of course, roll it up, and eat. Quick, and lots of protein! —Laurie Jones I use cottage cheese as a really healthy filling for baked potatoes. Cook the potatoes as usual and then scoop out the flesh. Mix this approximately equal amount of with cottage cheese and season with salt and pepper. Fill the potatoes back up with the mixture and dollop a bit more cottage cheese on top! Healthy, yummy and filling. —Caroline Middlebrook My favorite is mixing 1/2 cup of cottage cheese with 1/2 cup of sugar free jello. It’s yummy! —Mary Wasielewski I offer you a cottage cheese topping for a bagel, or perhaps a filling for a pita or celery stalks: Drop a portion of cottage cheese in some cheese cloth & squeeze, squeeze, squeeze out the liquid. Put it in a bowl with some garlicky Mrs. Dash or your favorite dry herbs/seasonings, and mush it with a fork. This spreads easily over a toasted bagel and won’t make it soggy! —Juliana Williamson-Page I have never been a cottage cheese fan, however, a great invention that I discovered is mixing a bowl of cottage cheese with fresh fruit and a spoonful of cool whip light. This is a great late night snack that always satisfies my sweet tooth attacks. Try it out, I’m sure you will love it!! —Sherrill Guinn cheesecake 2 cups dry curd pressed cottage cheese (fat percentage optional) 3 eggs 1/2 cup yogurt (any percentage of fat) 1/3 cup honey 1 tsp. grated lemon peel 1-2 tsp. vanilla Preheat oven to 350. Combine ingredients and process until satin smooth. Pour into loaf pan and bake 30 minutes or until edges are slightly browned. Cool and refrigerate for several hours. Top with fresh or cooked drained berries or fruit of choice. Serves 8. 148 calories per serving. 12.65 g of protein, 20.5 g of carbs, 2.5 g of fat. From “Breaking the Vicious Cycle” by Elaine Gottschall. —Carol Frilegh Scramble some eggs and just before you are ready to take them out of the pan, add some diced tomatoes and some cottage cheese just long enough to make them warm. The cheese should just start to melt a little but still look like pieces of cottage cheese. (Sounds gross but tastes good.) —Nancy Hill So glad to see more uses for my stand-by protein. Like many others I have a recipe that I too stumbled on. It is kind of like a Waldorf salad without the mayo (but you could add it if you wanted to). 1/2 cup cottage cheese 1/4 cup ultra low-fat Cool Whip or equivalent frozen edible oil type topping 1/2 apple cut up 1 tablespoon of Heath bar or Skor bar…caramel bits slivered almonds or walnuts (optional) Mix it all together and eat. Leave it overnight and the caramel will blend and it will taste even better. I can’t believe that this is good for me. I feel like I cheat every time I eat it. —Glenda Hey Krista, I thought I’d let you in on my favorite cottage cheese snack. Take a piece of good, chewy, whole wheat/multigrain bread and toast it to your prefered shade. Layer on some cottage cheese, and then top with some well-drained crushed pineapple. Sprinkle a little ginger over the whole thing, and you’ve got a very satisfying treat. It’s so incredibly good. I hope you like it as much as I like your site, which is lots and lots! —Tara. cottage cheese smoothie Hello Krista, I absolutely love your website! I wanted to pass along this delicious cottage cheese smoothie recipe for your cottage cheese page. It’s delicious and filling…..even my kids like it! In a blender combine: 1/2 cup of cottage cheese (low or nonfat) 1 cup fresh or frozen blueberries 1 cup of milk (low or nonfat) 1 scoop of protein powder (optional) 1 packet of Splenda or sweetener of choice For those that use flax oil, you can add a tablespoon to this and it doesn’t really change the taste. Blend for 1 to minutes, serve and enjoy! Best Regards, —Alexandra L Krista, Thanks for your great site. My workout partner and I especially love the cottage cheese page… it is our ultimate food, since we are teachers and need quick, packable lunches. I like Indian food, so I made up a recipe that is sort of Indianish: .5 cup cottage cheese (non or lowfat) .5 cup frozen spinach (the kind that comes in a bag can be thrown in while it’s still frozen) .5 cup organic canned lentils 1 t. curry powder garlic powder and pepper to taste I throw everything into a tupperware container the night before and just zap it for a couple of minutes in the microwave at lunch and stir. The cheese gets melty and I think it’s delicious. It’s a good way to get more veggies, protein and fiber, too. Thanks again, Alicia Hamilton christina’s two second miracle 1. toast a sourdough or whole wheat English Muffin 2. scoop on 1% or fat free cottage cheese 3. add some hot salsa sauce on top of the cottage cheese…that’s it! Yum Yum Yum Yum I hope you like it. You can use it on your page if you’d like. Take care, Christina mexican c.c. Since I am from Mexico I crave beans, cheese and spicy stuff. I am used to have pinto beans with “queso fresco” (fresh cheese in English, kind of cottage cheese I think) and a whole fresh “Serrano” chile (somewhat spicy). Well the thing is that since I started eating healthier and I could not give up on my beans and cheese I came up with this recipe, which at first I thought was kind of gross but after trying it I really enjoyed it. Here it is with approximated nutrition facts: 1/2 cup of black beans 1/4 cup of low fat cottage cheese Crushed red pepper or crushed cayenne pepper to taste Heat the beans and cottage cheese together in stove to the desired temperature, pour in a bowl and season with salt, black pepper and the crushed red pepper or cayenne if you like it spicy. Aprox. Nutrition facts: calories 155, carbohydrates 21.5g (total carb. 14.5g), protein 13.5g, fiber 7g, fat 1.7g. I hope you enjoy it. Magda K “cheesecake” mix 4oz low fat cream cheese 4oz low fat cottage cheese 1/2 sachet of sugar free jelly (any flavour you prefer) 3/4 pint of boiling water 60ml skimmed milk Chill the milk in the freezer in the container you’ll be whipping it in- don’t let it freeze, just get it icy cold. While milk is getting cold, sort out the two cheeses and stick them in a dish on the side so they’re ready for plonking in. Also make sure kettle is on to boil. Get milk out the freezer and using a milk frother, whip the cream till you get it as close to whipped cream consistency it will go. Put it back in the freezer. Make up sugar free jelly using ur 3/4 pint of boiling water and stir for two mins, till all the jelly crystals have completly dissolved. Leave jelly for 5 mins to cool down a little. Add cheeses to jelly and blend till smooth. Pour into dish u will be chilling it in and fold in whipped milk. Smooth down with a spatula and refigerate for 4 hours. Makes 4 servings, and each serving has 70 kcals and 4grams of carbs. N.B. you may want to add a calorie free sweetener tablet to the jelly crystals to sweeten it a little more, this doesn’t affect the carb or calorie count if u use the tablets that you can stick in tea/coffee. Also, you could use semi-skimmed or whole milk for a better whipped consistency if you like. Kindest regards, Gemma, Norwich UK cottage cheese waffles 2 Waffles (I usually go with 99% fat free ) Cottage cheese Parkay zero calorie/fat free “butter” spray Step 1. Warm up the 2 waffles Step.2 Spray Parkay spray on both sides (leave off or add something else if you like) Step 3. Spread cottage cheese onto waffles and then place onto each other sandwich-style. Step 4. Enjoy. —Jerald more cottage cheese waffles 2 whole grain frozen waffles (I get the kind with flax seeds) 1 C cottage cheese 1 C diced tomatoes- I use Roma tomatoes, so it’s usually 2 or 3. If you got big ones take the seeds out or it gets too watery. Toast waffles. Put 1/2 cup cottage on each waffle, and top with diced tomatoes. Sprinkle with salt and pepper to taste. Thanks again! Verna Mandel c.c. and yogurt I get 1 part cottage cheese, one part yoghurt and a teaspoon or half of dried cinnamon or sweetener, then mix this with a fork or spoon, whatever you prefer. Then spread it on some toasted fruit bread or scones. It also goes well with jam on them if you like. —Michael cottage cheese salad My fave cottage cheese crave of the moment involves fresh spinach, shredded carrots, garbanzo beans, cottage cheese OF COURSE and a wonderful (at least I think it is) salad dressing called Red Bull Italian. It’s full of garlic and a scant 25 calories per 2 Tbsp serving. It doesn’t get any better than this! (When I’m feeling naughty I sprinkle in dry roasted sunflower seeds to the above gorp) —Beth F cottage cheese pizza This is delicious and kids love it, too! Each pizza is 1 serving. Spread approx. 1 Tbsp pizza sauce over whole wheat pita. I get mine at Trader Joes. Over pizza sauce spread a heaping Tbsp fat free or low fat cottage cheese. Top that with sliced, cooked chicken breast or homemade turkey sausage. Add veggies if desired. Cook on top rack of oven at 475 degrees for 9 min. Who said pizza was bad for you? :) YUM YUM YUM! —Rose cottage cheese omelet In keeping with your love of cottage cheese…I add it to my omelet in the morning! Mmmmmmmmm…love cottage cheese. Egg beaters (or egg substitute) equivalent to 6 eggs 1/2 cup cottage cheese 1/2 cup fat free shredded cheese 2 roma tomatoes Green onions to taste Salt Pepper **I add a few mushrooms, but these can be omitted for those who hate the little fungi. Mix all ingredients together in a bowl. I distribute evenly into small loaf pans (think banana nut bread) or you can make smaller ones and put in a muffin pan. Cook at 350 degrees for about 25 – 30 minutes. I make three at a time and store them in the refrigerator. Keeps me from having to cook every morning and leaves me time to workout instead. Hope you enjoy, Diane quick cottage cheese “lasagne” This is a super easy lunch idea for people in a time crunch. Cook up some whole wheat pasta, then throw some cottage cheese and tomato sauce or natural pasta sauce on top. (Classico is great.) Nuke till heated through… and voila, tastes like lasagne! Mine has been watery, but if I used dry curd or drained it a bit I’m sure it would be better. —Tammy, Yukon mock alfredo 1 1/2 C. fat-free cottage cheese 1/2 C. skim milk 2 garlic cloves, minced 2 tbsp flour 1 tbsp lemon juice 1 tsp dried basil 1/2 tsp dried mustard 1/2 tsp pepper 1/4 tsp salt 8 oz cooked & drained pasta of choice 1 – 2 tomatoes, peeled and diced In blender or processor, combine cottage cheese, milk and garlic until smooth. Add flour, lemon juice, basil, mustard, salt and pepper until well blended. Pour into saucepan and heat at medium-low until thickened. Do NOT boil. Serve over pasta – topping with diced tomatoes. Variations: I leave out the dry mustard, and sometimes throw in 3 oz fat free cream cheese and a sprinkle of parmesan for a more authentic taste. I also make a recipe-and-a-half because this isn’t saucy enough for us once mixed with the pasta Enjoy! Melissa K dining hall cottage cheese Here is a good, quick, easy, college dining hall cottage cheese recipe. Cottage cheese Broccoli Tomato sauce (marinara sauce) Take broccoli from the salad bar. Take two glass dishes. Fill one with broccoli, put the other dish on top of the broccoli-filled bowl, upside down. (So you create a dome.) Microwave for about 30-60 seconds. This creates steamed broccoli. Mix the broccoli with cottage cheese and tomato sauce. It tastes great, is contains lots of protein and vitamins, and grosses out your friends. (It doesn’t look great, but it tastes wonderful.) —Melissa cajun cottage cheese 1 cup of no-fat CC half a can of black beans (washed of course..or you will regret it!) 1 13-oz can of chicken breast Cajun spice to taste Throw it all in a glass bowl, put it in the microwave for two minutes and presto!! Even my son loves this meal, and he is 11. Shawn Pierce live-culture cottage cheese I’ve always had sort of a problem with cottage cheese—its lack of flavor, snotlike consistency, etc. Recently, however, I’ve fallen completely in love with live-culture cottage cheese. The brand we can get in California is Nancy’s, and it has a really terrific, tangy flavor and a much denser (and in my opinion, more palatable) consistency than the usual grocery-store brands. Presumably there are other local variations. I can scarf it down by the tubful without hurling! Now there’s an endorsement. I may finally get my protein in the 1g./lb. bodyweight range. Cheers, Nathan cottage cheese phyllo logs Last year I discovered this cottage cheese recipe among my mother’s heap of Eastern European recipes, and I thought I’d share: 1 pkg phyllo pastry 6 tbsp sugar (or Splenda, etc) ? cup raisins 1 pkg dry pressed cottage cheese 3 eggs 2 tsp cinnamon 1 lb chopped tart apples (Granny Smith work the best) Phyllo pastry is normally kept in the freezer. The night before, put it in the fridge so it defrosts a bit. If you leave it on the counter, the phyllo sheets will stick together. Mix the cheese, eggs, sugar, apples, raisins and cinnamon. (You can add more raisins and cinnamon to taste, or you can omit them altogether.) Take the phyllo sheets, four at a time. Lightly brush a little bit of canola (or another kind) oil between the layers. Put a generous amount of filling on top of the phyllo pastry. Roll into a log (but not too tightly). Place on lightly oiled square shaped (12 x 15 inch-ish) pan. You should be able to fit 3 logs onto one pan. Lightly brush tops of logs with oil. Bake at 450 F until nice and brown. —Katarina your cc is in my peanut butter! your peanut butter is in my cc! I’m sending a cottage cheese recipe that my Grandmother introduced me many years ago. I love this for breakfast, lunch, or a snack. My husband says it’s utterly disgusting, but he doesn’t like ANY type of cheese, so what does he know?? LOL! toasted whole wheat toast, english muffin or bagel cottage cheese peanut butter Spread the peanut butter on the bread as soon as it pops out of the toaster so the warmth will melt it a bit making it easier to spread less on. Spoon cottage cheese over peanut butter. Enjoy! —Linda R. cottage cheese muffins I have another cottage cheese recipe to share – it’s a modification of the cottage cheese pancakes recipe. Handy for those of us who have to eat breakfast in the car! Add ingredients to blender in this order – blend after each ingredient. Bake at 375 for approx 25 minutes. Makes 6 muffins. 1 egg 1 c cottage cheese 2 T fat free half and half 1 t vanilla 1 t cinnamon 3 packets splenda 1 t baking powder 1 banana 1 c oatmeal Thanks! Belinda cottage cheese danish Place 1/4 cup cottage cheese on 1 piece whole wheat bread. Sprinkle with Equal and cinnamon. Place under broiler until bubbly. —Amy super yummy cottage cheese pasta I dearly adore cottage cheese. Today I made sort of a deconstructed veggie lasagna with lots of cottage cheese in it. Incredibly satisfying. 2 cups cooked whole wheat, spelt, or kamut pasta (I use rotini-style) 1 can of tomato sauce about 10 sliced button mushrooms 2 cloves fresh garlic, minced pan spray 1 large ripe tomato, chopped 1/2 package frozen chopped spinach, thawed and drained 2 tbs capers 1/2 cup chopped black olives 2 sticks of string cheese or 2 oz shredded mozzarella (string cheese was all I had) 1 cup cottage cheese 1/2 cup chopped fresh basil Saute the garlic in pan spray for a few moments, then add the mushrooms. When they start to soften, add the spinach, capers, chopped tomato, and olives. Let the flavors mix for a minute or two. Then add the pasta and tomato sauce. When that all comes to a bubbly boil, add the basil and cottage cheese. Tear up the string cheese, or just use shredded mozzarella sprinkled over the top of the hot mixture so it melts. Mmm… just like lasagna. This recipe makes about three large-ish servings. You’d be surprised how filling one serving is. Love from Kona, Liz bulgarian potatoes Serves 10 to 12 2 cups of 4% cottage cheese (1 lb) 1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted and cooled slightly 1 1/4 tsp. salt 3/4 tsp black pepper 3 lbs russet baking potatoes, about 6 medium 2 lg. eggs 1 cup plain whole-milk yogurt Put oven rack in middle position and preheat oven to 375 F. Butter a 2 1/2-qt. baking dish (about 12 x 10 x 2 inches). Puree cottage cheese in a food processor until it is as smooth as possible, about 1 minute, then add butter, 1 tsp of the salt and 1/2 tsp of the pepper and blend until well combined well. Peel potatoes and cut crosswise using an adjustable-blade slicer into 1/8-inch-thick slices. Spread one third of the potatoes evenly in 1 layer in dish and top with one third (a scant cup) cottage cheese mixture (mixture will not cover potatoes completely). Continue layering potatoes and CC mixture, ending with mixture. Cover tightly with foil and bake until potatoes are tender, 1 to 1 1/4 hrs. Whisk together eggs, yogurt, remaining 1/4 tsp salt and pepper. Pour over potatoes and bake, uncovered, until custard is set, about 20 minutes. Note: Potatoes with custard can be baked 1 day ahead and cooled completely, then chilled, covered with foil. Reheat, covered, in a 375 F oven until hot, about 3 minutes. —Heidi “men’s favourite salad” Here’s a cottage cheese recipe that I found in Gourmet magazine. The theme was their favorite recipes from the last 65 years. This recipe is their top pick from 1969 and I especially like the name: Men’s Favorite Salad. Barbara Edwards, the reader who sent us this recipe, wrote that every time she served this salad, the men in the group would “lick the platter clean.” We found the women in our test kitchens were crunching on it as happily as the men. 1 (2 1/2-lb) green cabbage, outer leaves discarded 1 med. onion, halved lengthwise, then thinly sliced crosswise 2 Tbl. chopped fresh flat leaf parsley 2 cups 4% small-curd cottage cheese (16 oz) 1/2 cup plus 2 Tbl mayonnaise 1 tsp fresh lemon juice, or more to taste 1 tsp. salt 1/2 tsp. black pepper Cut cabbage into 2-inch wedges and core, then very thinly slice crosswise. Transfer to a large bowl. Add remaining ingredients and toss to coat. Let stand 15 minutes (or chill up to 2 hrs) to allow flavors to meld. Hope it doesn’t have too much mayo; I guess you could always substitute some yogurt to make it healthier. —Heidi Krista, I am massively inspired by your cottage cheese site and read through all the recipes with enthusiasm – I can’t wait to try them out. I was amazed to find that my personal favourite recipe for c.c. was not in there. A delicious party dip or spread for toast (I prefer to lather it on rye crisp breads for more dip, less dip delivery vehicle!) is to mix c.c. with smoked peppered mackerel – just mash the fish with a fork first. Hey presto ‘cant-get-enough’ protein and healthy fish oils – you can’t go wrong! Kylie — UK best freakin’ scrambled eggs ever Growing up, my Grandma made the best freakin’ scrambled eggs ever… I found out later that her sweet & buttery secret was cottage cheese. This is a quick and dirty breakfast that makes you feel like you’ve actually ate something. If you do it right, all you need is a pan, spatula, two bowls, two forks, and 5 minutes. It is easy on the dishes, easy on your time, and all that great protein! 5 minutes to the best scrambled eggs you’ve ever had. Step 1) Put your non-stick pan on med-high heat Step 2) Mix well 3 eggs (or 3 egg whites and an egg), a dash of salt, a dash of Molly McButter, two tablespoons of cottage cheese, and one tablespoon of water. Step 3) Spray pan lightly with a non-stick oil Step 4) Fry up those eggs! Your pan is hot at this point so keep stirring for about 3 minutes, don’t stop! Step 5) Done! Enjoy the fluffiest sweet-cheesy eggs you’ve ever had. –Brian Jones I have had pretty bad TMJ since I was 9 or so, and in the past 15 years I developed a liking for mushy, barely-chew foods despite never being fed porridgey-type foods in my childhood due to my mother’s hatred of mush. I began eating cottage cheese in college b/c I nearly became an undeclared vegetarian at the end of my first year of eating meat from on-campus dining. The lack of protein sources made the muscles around my knees ache when going up stairs after going for 4 days w/out protein. The other “protein” I ate couple times a week were cubes of jello from the salad bar and all sorts of beans. Cottage cheese’s bouncy texture combined w/ canned mandarine sections from the salad bar was a taste/texture treat for me! oatmeal-cottage cheese I began eating oatmeal after college, and use about 1.5 times the water called for on the packages. I start with warm/hot water if possible, stir it with the oats to soak for a min, then microwave it 30 seconds at a time to make sure it’s almost pasty w/out boiling over, for about a total of 2 minutes, depending on the starting temperature of the water. And, as soon as it’s out of the microwave when it’s way too steaming to consume, I drop in a couple tablespoonfuls of cold cottage cheese (or a gigantic spoonful) for every half cup of cooked oatmeal and stir it in. This cools the oatmeal to a still-hot but palatable temp. And, the cottage cheese melts a bit and stretches out fine strings, kind of like mozzarella. To this, I often add chopped apples in the last 15-30 secs of cooking, and either a dash of nutmeg or pumpkin pie spice. A drizzle of honey also gives it a complicated flavor! The different textures are great b/c not all the cheese melts, and it’s not just pasty oatmeal, but has softened apples/fruit and plump cheese. stuffed tomatoes Using a mix of slightly drained cottage cheese and chopped pickles, olives, pickled garlic, artichokes or any flavorful veg. and to stuff halved tomatoes is a great summer lunch! Scoop the tomatoes out and grind some fresh pepper over them, make the filling w/ chopped tomato innards and the rest then stuff it all back into the tomatoes. Chopped almonds/pecans/walnuts add crunch to it all, and goes well on a bed of salad greens too, instead of a dressing. I guess this e-mail got very long. I meant to thank you for all the recipes, some of which are simple enough for me to to implement. –Grace

cottage cheese & tortilla stackup 1 lb container cottage cheese 4 oz can diced green chiles 1 egg, beaten (can use 2 if eggs are smallish) 1 dozen or so corn tortillas grated jack/cheddar cheese Mix together the cc, chiles and egg(s) in a bowl. Layer tortillas, then mix, then grated cheese in a baking dish and bake at 350F for 30-45 minutes. Serves 6 or so. vegetarian enchiladas corn tortillas (heated until pliable) enchilada sauce (I use the canned variety, easy) cottage cheese rice (optional) green onion jack cheese Mix together all ingredients except the tortillas and sauce, then spoon the filling into the tortillas, roll, put in a baking dish, then top with the sauce. Cook at about 350F about 20-30 minutes (until they’re heated through, and cheese is all melted) —Lorianne Rosales potatoes with cottage cheese sauce 16 or 24 oz lowfat cottage cheese 1 or 2 baked 9or boiled) potatoes 2 or 3 green onions chopped 1 to 2 oz lowfat milk salt and pepper to taste Bake potatoes or boil potatoes or heat a can of potatoes. Mix all other ingredients in bowl and keep refrigerated until potatoes are ready. Pour mixture over potatoes and enjoy! —Frank Utecht As a side dish or whatever. I take tomatoes from my garden and slice them open like a flower, then put some cottage cheese in the centre, with a little bit of pepper. And bingo! a great tasty little snack/side/whatever. Enjoy! —Rosie Wysong make yer own c.c.! This recipe is drier and not soupy (unless you put cream with it just before you eat it.) If you put the cream on it when you make it then it will sour and be too ‘tart’ to eat. I prefer it without the cream as that is how my grandmother made it. My recipe is my grandmother’s, and makes a small curd cheese. To about two gallons of skimmed milk I add a cup of buttermilk and allow the milk to come to room temperature and sit, covered, for 24 hours. I then gently cut the curd into about half inch cubes and let it rest for about 15 minutes. Then I start to very gently stir and warm the curds. I do this by using a ‘double boiler’ method where I heat the water gently, raising the temperature about a degree a minute until it gets about 110 F and let it stay there for about thirty minutes. Then raise it to about 120 and keep stirring gently until the curds are ‘dry’…. in other words they will shrink up and sink to the bottom of the pot. If you bite into the curd and it is like yogurt it is not done yet. When it is done, strain and rinse with ice cold water and put into cheese cloth and squeeze out the moisture until it is dry enough to suit you. Salt and put into container and refrigerate. —Donna R Myers-Raybon (a lucky grrl who has her own cows and goats) better than butter (bread spread, but I use it on low-sodium rye crisp, etc) 1 pint lowfat cottage cheese 1/4 cup water 4 Tablespoons nonfat dry milk 2 packages ButterBuds (butter flavor mix) 1-3 packages Splenda sweetener (the amount is to your taste preference – can also use Sweet-N-Low or Equal, but I think Splenda tastes better.) Put all ingredients in the blender. Blend on low and increase speed until smooth. Pour/scrape it all back into the cottage cheese tub and store in refrigerator. This is less than 7 calories per teaspoon. A huge difference from butter or margarine! 2 envelopes of Butter Buds Mix is equal to 1/4 cup of the Butter Buds Sprinkles. Also, Butter Buds has a refridgerator life of only 3 days once it’s been liquified, so I blend all the ingredients for this spread but wait to add the Butter Buds as I want to use it. 1/4 cup of the cottage cheese mixture with 1/2 Tablespoon of Butter Buds Sprinkles mixed in at the last minute is the right ratio. —Gayle W Time for some horn tootin’! Rave reviews for the cottage cheese page… Reader Nick Haines writes: I’m 23 and had never even tried cottage cheese before now. Always figured it was just one of those dieter’s foods. I ran across your page tonight while surfing for nutrition info, and came across “The Cottage Cheese Page”. Seeing as how the rest of your site seemed to be true (and you weren’t selling anything), I figured I’d give this stuff a try. BTW, I have to disagree with the weightlifters who say it tastes bad; I find it has almost no taste at all (That’s not necessarily a bad thing). I LOVE tuna, I can eat that stuff right out of the can! So I figured I try the tuna and cottage cheese mix. I was VERY surprised to find that it tasted even BETTER with the cottage cheese!! One $0.50 can of tuna in spring water, and half a cup of cottage cheese turned out to be a whole meal (if you eat 6 small meals, anyway). I looked at the packages and crunched a few numbers and this 1 bowl of tuna funk had just about the right amount of fat for 1 meal, a negligable amount of carbos, and almost 50 grams of protien!!! Who the hell needs expensive (and usually nasty tasting) protein shakes?!?!? I am indebted to you for this awesome tip, and wanted you to know that you work in this web page has not gone unappreciated! “gross out your friends” breakfast 1/2 cup CC 3 oz tuna 5 or more egg whites (and one yolk if you want) 1/3 cup dry oatmeal Seasonings (anny good Southerner will use Tony Chachere’s or “Tony’s”) Mix well, scramble in a skillet. Chow down. Smells bad, tastes great—kinda like fried matzo. Gracias, Stephanie Austin, TX or, without the tuna if you prefer… 1/2 cup cottage cheese 1/2 cup old fashioned oatmeal (dry not cooked) 2 or 3 packets of Splenda 4 Egg Whites Put all ingredients in blender. Spray frying pan with Pam Spray. Pour ingredients into frying pan. It makes one big pancake. I usually top it with a low sugar syrup or fruit spread. I sometimes add 1 tsp. of all natural peanut butter to it. It tastes great. Regards, Linda L I love my cottage cheese either plain, but usually mixed with applesauce (kind of like the yogurt style). I don’t really like the yogurt style, because it sits heavier than the applesauce. With the applesauce/cc mix, it is a little like a dessert, but very light and tasty! I will try the other recipes as soon as I head to the store! Great webpage! —Faith Cottage cheese mixed with dried Cranberries is absolutely delicious! I came upon this one day when I was starving and these were the only two things in the fridge worth eating. I just tried it again and it is still good. —Bruce Turnbull Sounds totally gross – but tastes totally killer: cottage cheesey steel cut blues 1/2 cup cottage cheese 1/2 cup blueberries ¼ cup steel cut oats ¼ cup sugar-free maple syrup 1 tsp Splenda Mix cold cooked steel cut oats with Maple syrup. Place in bowl or container. Top with cottage cheese sweetened with one packet Splenda, add thawed blueberries. (Sometimes I leave out the blueberries and just to 1/2 cup oats) stace’s waffles 1 egg white 1/2 cup cottage cheese 1/2 cup cup Bob’s Redmill 10-grain pancake mix 1 tsp Splenda ½ tsp vanilla extract ¼ cup sugar-free maple syrup Blend together cottage cheese, egg whites and vanilla (I use a handheld ’stick’ blender) Add waffle mix and Splenda and mix til smooth. Mixture is slightly thick. Pour batter in pre-heated waffle iron coated with cooking spray. You MUST spray iron for every batch! Do not overfill! Cook until well browned, these take longer to cook then regular waffles but every iron varies. Serve with syrup. —Lisa McPherron cottage cheese pasta I was looking at your site (it’s good!) because I and my partner are getting into weight training. My mother in law is part of a study to see if lifting weights helps lower blood sugar levels for type II diabetes (looks like it does) and she’s encouraged us to do it too. As we are too bogged down with the new baby to manage to get to our regular martial arts training we got right into it at once – we just do it at home with free weights. Anyway, I found your cottage cheese page, and can’t believe people don’t like it!! Here’s my cottage cheese pasta that’s my absolute favorite lunch meal, especially when it’s cold and wet as it is now – I’m in Australia by the way. I get four or five heaping tablespoons of cottage cheese, a couple of heaping tablespoons of freshly grated parmesan cheese, and a garlic clove or two, finely chopped. I also add some Italian (flat-leaved) parsley, finely chopped if we have any. And then I mix in about 300g of pasta – I don’t drain it too thoroughly, as that bit of extra liquid helps melt and mush up the cottage cheese a bit. And that’s two good large steaming bowlfuls to stave off winter chills. —Judy chocolate c.c. Here is a recipe I use for a chocolate treat: 1 large box of sugar-free, fat-free chocolate pudding mix 2 cups of cottage cheese 4 eggs 6 or 8 packets of Splenda Mix together with mixer or in blender. Bake for about 30 minutes at 350. Divide into ½ cup portions. Delicious. Thanks for all your inspiration Angie G cottage cheese pb&c 1/2 cup Cottage Cheese (look for the Friendship 1% Whipped Spreadable as it has 16 g of protein and only 3 g of carbs) 1 teaspoon vanilla 1-2 teaspoons of peanut butter 1 packet of splenda 1 teaspoon of cocoa powder Mix them together until evenly mixed and enjoy! JoLynn C cottage cheese salad dressing This is great for grrls (and boyys) who want a tasty, healthy, protein-packed alternative to their beloved Caesar, Ranch, Bleu Cheese, etc. dressings. Mix 1/2 c. lowfat cottage cheese with Hidden Valley Seasoning and Ranch Dressing Mix to taste (I usually start out with 1/2 tsp and add from there.) Add to favorite salad (I like either baby spring greens or chopped up romaine, some grillled chicken, some black beans, carrots, peppers, etc. etc.,) mix it up and silently gloat over the amount of protein you are consuming in one delicious meal. Be kind to others around you who are still eating regular creamy dressings or worse, ‘fat-free’ versions of same. They just don’t know any better. In fact, you can mix the cottage cheese with any savory sort of spice, or just plain with a tiny bit of salt and pepper, as a salad dressing. I’ve tried cajun spices, taco seasoning, lemon juice, a bit of flax oil and Mrs. Dash’s. It’s just great to know you don’t have to give up ‘creamy’ salad dressings to eat clean and get great nutrition. Julie G Colorado cottage cheese and apple It surprises me that you have missed the simplest, easiest and most delicious way of eating it. On a plate with a fresh cut apple. It doesn’t need another thing. I’m in Australia, and so the apples I would use are a Pink Lady (sharp, sweet and crisp) or a Fuji (tastes like a great apple smells). Just quarter (or more – I usually do 12ths) an unpeeled apple. Spread cottage with cottage cheese and enjoy. It is the perfect snack for eating at your desk post workout, but I love it just about any time. Jean cottage cheese “ice cream” It sounds gross, but if you mix some vanilla and equal with cottage cheese, it seriously tastes like ice cream. I also take the above, mix in some fresh strawberries or blueberries, and occaisionally top it with some Kashi Go-Lean cereal. It is one of my favorite breakfasts, although I can honestly say I have eaten it for lunch or dinner sometimes as well. Cheers, Erica grilled sweet cottage cheese Take your choice of plain wholegrain breadstuff: Slice of bread, 1/2 english muffin, 1/2 bagel, whateva. Spread with fruit preserves — regular, low sugar, all-fruit, whatever floats your boat. (Strawberry would be the traditional flavor, but any will do.) Spread with a thick layer of cottage cheese. Sprinkle with a very light dusting of sugar or sugar substitute (optional). Broil until bread is toasty on the edges and cheese is melty. If you use a lot of cottage cheese you may have to eat with a fork, but with a thin layer you can eat out of hand. Yum! —FunnieGrrl cottage cheese pancakes I’m also not really one for the measuring cups, so you have to experiment ’til you get it right, and there are lots of variations. The original idea came from the Moosewood Cookbook, also a Canadian standard, where there’s a delicious entry of Cottage Cheese and Apple Pancakes. You can add shredded apple to these, too. Take a bit less than a half cup of rye flour (it’s easily available in Finland and I have an unresearched belief that it’s healthier, but you could use any flour) and a wee bit of baking powder. Add one egg and a cup or so of cottage cheese. Throw in some cinnamon, or nutmeg, or cardamom, etc, if you like. A couple generous dashes of milk (I usually use soy, doesn’t matter either way), and voila: batter. Now, the pan. I always screw up my first pancake because I’m generally impatient, and when I’m making these I’m hungrier than usual. But the pan should be so hot that a droplet of water thrown on its surface will bounce before evaporating. Use butter/nonstick spray/whatever your frying medium of choice is, and lay on the batter. Flip them when the edges are dry and bubbles are coming through the middle. After flipping, cook them a little longer than you would your average Aunt Jemima numbers. Serve hot. I don’t bother with maple syrup because the butter and cinnamon give enough flavour – plus these are great as a more savoury treat. —Johanna, Finland crustless quiche I make this crustless quiche all the time, and it’s a HUGE favourite with people who don’t even know there’s cc in it! It’s really, really good, and smells fantastic. 4 eggs handful of mushrooms, sliced 100g (or more — it doesn’t matter much) non-fat cottage cheese, onion and chive variety for preference 1 onion, finely chopped 25g shredded cheese (optional) tomato, sliced salt, pepper, and parsley Preheat your oven to 200°C/400°F/gas mark 6 and spray a 20cm square pan or Springform pan with olive oil spray. In a small bowl, whisk the eggs with the cottage cheese until well combined and fold in the diced onion, mushrooms, and cheese (if using). Pour into your pan and top with tomato slices. Bake for approximately 30 minutes, or until the eggs have set and the top has gone as golden as you like it. Serves 4, or 2 if you’re very hungry, and keeps well in the fridge. You can also dump a tin of macaroni and cheese into it, in lieu of the shredded cheese, and a small tin of drained sweetcorn. From my food site Gastroblog.com – Jackie middle eastern cottage cheese sandwich 1/2 lavash or whole wheat pita hummus cucumber slices tomato slices salt, pepper, garlic powder, and olive oil cottage cheese Slather your favorite hummus on the lavash (or pita if you prefer) and drizzle a little olive oil on top. Sprinkle kosher salt & fresh ground pepper & garlic powder on top. Add sliced cucumber & tomato. Glob cc in center and roll that bad boy up. Wow. Adding a little dill and grilled vidalia onion slices might be good, too. I just didn’t have them :(. Hope you like! Nicole faux loaded baked potato 1 med. potato 2 strips turkey bacon Butter buds or butter spray 1/2 cup lowfat cottage cheese chives or green onions salt and pepper Microwave the turkey bacon according to package directions. As it cools, microwave the potato for 7-8 min. Slice open and mash butter buds, salt and pepper into the flesh. Top with cottage cheese, crumbled turkey bacon and chives. —Christine baked sweet potato 1 medium-large sweet potato 1/2 tub onion and chive flavour cottage cheese 1 dessert spoon low cal ketchup Pinch chilli flakes Dash fresh lemon juice Freshly ground black pepper Bake potato in microwave til soft, remove skin and discard. Chop up potato flesh. Mix cottage cheese, ketchup, chilli flakes and lemon juice together. Dollop on top of potato, add pepper to taste. Looks like vomit but tastes divine! Protein, complex carbs and vitamin C all in one fast meal. Nice with steamed broccoli. —Anni mexican salad 1 cup chopped Romaine lettuce 4 oz. boneless skinless chicken breast 2 tsp taco seasoning Dressing 1/2 cup cottage cheese 2 tsp taco seasoning 1 Tbls chopped red bell pepper 1 Tbls chopped green onion 1 Tbls chopped cilantro Rub chicken breast with 2 tsp of taco seasoning then grill. Chop breast into bite size pieces. Set aside. Mix all ‘dressing’ ingredients together. For smoother consistency place cottage cheese and taco seasoning in blender, mix until smooth, then stir in remaining ingredients. Place lettuce on plate. Place the chicken on top of the lettuce, then top with dressing and serve. —Deana F. berry-tastic frozen cottage cheese joy 1/2 cup frozen strawberries or mixed berries 1/2 semi-frozen banana 1/2 cup NO SALT ADDED cottage cheese (friendship is great!) 2 packets artificial sweentener or 1 T honey Puree all in heavy duty blender or food processor until smooth and top with fresh berries, if desired. —Jean J. cc salad topper I mix cottage cheese with pesto, or cottage cheese with mustard, and top salads with it. It’s really excellent! —Erin I love to take lowfat cottage cheese with chives and put a ton of garlic pepper in it to have with veggies. It’s the ultimate alternative to a peppercorn ranch type dip. Just when you think you have added too much garlic pepper, add more. It’s so good! I even put it on salads and sandwiches. —Katie cottage cheese and spinach pie 1 10 oz. package frozen spinach (very well drained, water squeezed out) 1 cup low or non-fat cottage cheese 3 egg whites 1 small onion, chopped any way you like A handful of fresh basil, chopped Fresh garlic cloves to taste (I used 5 medium) 4 tbsp. grated cheese (I use Romano) Combine all ingredients. Place into non-stick sprayed casserole, or 9-inch cast iron skillet. Bake at 350º for about 45 minutes or until top is browned. blenderizationy goodness I don’t like the texture of cottage cheese, so I buy the cottage cheese with pineapple in it and put it in the blender. It is a little bit thick for my blender so I add just a touch of milk. It is really good! It is a good idea for people like me who don’t like the bumps. cottage cheese breakfast 1/2 cup cooked barley 1/2 cup cottage cheese 1 tbsp jam or honey 2 tbsp pumpkin or sunflower seeds 2 tbsp raisins a pinch of wheat bran or germ Heat the barley and cottage cheese in the microwave until warm. Add other ingredients and stir together. I ate this for breakfast today and just about died. So tasty. I’m sure it’s good with plain yogurt too. Aloha from Kona, Liz cottage cheese and fruit preserves Spoon a small amount of all-fruit preserves without added sugar into a small bowl of cottage cheese. I personally prefer not to mix it all the way in, so some bites are sweeter than others. Optional addendum to the “super easy breakfast”: Mix in a small amount of your favorite crunchy cereal. I use Kashi Go-lean Crunch! myself. Thanks again, Dan college cheese nachos I just came up with a new cottage cheese recipe that I thought you might enjoy. It’s inspired by the cottage cheese nachos recipe, but using only the ingredients that I (read: poor college kid) happened to have in the kitchen: one can of Ranch Style pinto beans, pour in some Pace picante sauce, and about a cup or so of cottage cheese (I didn’t measure). Mix it together – no need to blend unless you just really want to – and scoop some of it over some frito-like corn chips. I’m not gonna lie – it looks really, really gross, but tastes kind of like a mixture between homemade chili and salsa. —Kayla in Texas on the go breakfast shake I’m a bulking male, so scale recipe to fit your goals. 2 cups raw oatmeal Throw it in a blender and blend it a bit. Half pound frozen blueberries (or other fruit, frozen works well) Throw it in and blend some more. Then take: half cup cottage cheese spinach, perhaps 40-50 gram worth of whey protein tiny drizzle of honey sprinkling of flax seeds unless you prefer to ingest carbs and fats seperately Turn on the blender and pour in water slowly till it swirls around to the consistency you want it at. Chug it down. it’s actually sort of good… tasteless almost, except for the vague blueberry/protein/flax thing. Here’s one more. Throw fatfree/lowfat/whatever cottage cheese into a food processor with some lightly cooked mixed vegetables. I like them defrosted in the microwave then thrown in a hot pan with some coconut oil and cumin/coriander/fennel seed/whatever spices you want for no more than a few minutes. Add some raw spinach and process till it’s smooth. Tastes spicy and rich like guacamole. Makes for an awesome dip, though I can’t think of anything to dip besides raw veggies. Any suggestions? Oh, cayanne pepper to up the heat works well too. —Dev cottage cheese and egg breakfast muffins From the great food blog Kalyn’s Kitchen When I was a kid, there was a tavern/restaurant 1 block from our home. When you entered, the owner always had a table with a LARGE bowl of peppered cottage cheese to which he had added chopped green onions – tops and all. He had packages of plain saltine/soda crackers and everyone just heaped on the c.c. and enjoyed…yum, yum. I still make it to this day…takes me back to my youth. I will also add alone or any combination of: chopped, drained tomato; pepperoncini; Vidalia onions; or salsa. – Gigi, Pittsburgh, PA Here’s one easy cottage cheese snack I really enjoy which is simply; 1 cup of cottage cheese 1/2 to 1 tsp mild indian curry paste –Gary Brandel My cottage cheese “recipe” is this: 1. Put 1/2 cup (113 grams) cottage cheese in a bowl. 2. Add a serving or two of fruit (fresh, frozen, dried, or canned pineapple, banana, berries, orange, apple, pear, or whatever you like). I like mine cut into small bite-size pieces. The idea is to get a bit of everything in every bite! 3. Add some chopped nuts or seeds (amount to equal about 10 grams of fat or whatever your plan calls for). 4. Optional: add a a little fresh vegetable (sliced celery and/or grated carrot, for example). 5. Optional: add a sprinkle of crunchy carb such as granola, Grape Nuts, or crushed sesame sticks. My current favorite combinations are banana/almonds and apple/celery/walnuts. Regards, Michal Here’s my ultimate childhood comfort food. My Mom made this for us every time we were sick: egg noodles cottage cheese sugar (or you could use stevia or Splenda) cinnamon Heat & serve. It tastes like a hug. Also, to add to your lasagna recipes: I like to use egg roll wrappers as lasagna noodles when I make a single-serving lasagna at home. Light & low-cal, very tasty. –alwswrite One from Jamie Oliver, with a twist. His basic recipe: Make a whole load of dry mix from: (portioned to your liking) mostly porridge oats a decent amount of bran brown sugar dried fruit of your choice nuts of your choice The night before you want to eat it, put enough mix (you can do a few days worth) in a bowl, plus enough milk to cover the dry mix. Cover and leave in the fridge. In the morning get out your portion, add any fresh fruit you want, and more milk to loosen up the mix. And then I add about 2 table spoons of cottage cheese on top and stir. –Jeff Chong cottage cheese caprese salad Cottage cheese (however much a serving is to you) Tomato pieces (any kind of tomato you like cut into bite-size chunks) Basil leaves (torn, or cut into small strips with a knife or scissors) Extra virgin olive oil to taste Pepper to taste Mix it all together in a bowl and enjoy. Thanks, Diane Here’s the receipe for my favourtie healthy + light snack: Put a nice slick of honey on 2 slices of crackerbread and add plenty of CC on top: voila – a brilliant and yummy sweet n creamy treat! –Kiara Krista, I love your cottage cheese page. I eat cottage cheese almost every day. I wanted to share with you some yummy and simple recipes. I mix about a half cup of cottage cheese with a couple of tablespoons of pomegranate seeds and a tablespoon of honey. It is so delicious. Another one if my favorites is to mix sliced green onions, sliced radishes, and toasted sesame seeds into a serving of cottage cheese. Kathryn mocha miracle I live in Sweden and that sort of interferes with my high protein diet. Here, tofu is non existing. Tuna (except for the canned kind): non existing. And as I don’t eat meat, that leaves me to a looooot of daily cottage cheese. So thanks everyone for the inspiring recipes. Now – take three tablespoons of cottage cheese, a tablespoon of (frozen) blueberries, 100 mL (sorry, European girl entering) of skim milk, 100 mL of low fat yogurt, a tablespoon of cocoa powder, a teaspoon of instant coffee and half a banana. Put it all in the blender and wait for about a minute. If you’re in a hurry you can take it out quicker, but it gets nice and airy if you give it some time. Top with some almonds and you have my mid morning snack-meal. With a handful of oats, it can go as breakfast as well.Greetings from a Dutch cottage cheese fan! – Tack så mycket! Med vänliga hälsningar/kind regards, Ellen W

One person was insulted that I had called her stupid, as if by putting the word “stupid” into an article I had personally reached into her living room in Peoria or Sudbury and pointed an accusing finger at her. She may not have been aware of the now-famous line from the U.S. Presidential race, “It’s the economy, stupid”, or even the KISS principle that my math teacher used to promote, which means, Keep It Simple, Stupid. Hell, there are at least two lines of publications which explicitly reference the less-than-optimal-cranial capacity of their readership, but who shall both remain nameless since last time I titled an article F*r D*mmies, I got a snide letter from a legal bean counter. I admit it was a blatant five-finger discount. I guess they’ve never heard of the principle about ripoffs being the sincerest form of flattery.

Anyway. I wasn’t calling any of you stupid. Let’s have a group hug before we move on.

Okay, now that I’ve validated all of you and your diverse yet equally valuable intellectual fortitude, let’s move on to the next group of emails. I received some worried correspondence from people who were trying to sort out the mess of information surrounding lowcarb eating and ketogenic dieting. Many wanted to know how I felt about the Atkins diet, or whether high protein was the same as lowcarb, and whether I really was an oppressor of bread.

As usual, we need a road map through Crap Swamp. As I said in Part 2, there is a mountain of mythology about lowcarb that now equals the mythology produced about low fat ten years ago. It can make anyone without a biochem degree tear their hair out.

Allow me to suggest some simple principles that should be your guide.

how NOT to eat

I am addressing my comments here primarily to folks consuming a North American and UK type of diet. The eating habits of other regions, particularly Continental Europe and Asia, tend to be better, although the prevalence of processed food is increasing, especially among younger consumers. This diet is characterized by:

• Lower intakes of fruit and vegetables
• Lower intake of fibre
• High intakes of saturated fat or trans fats
• Frequent consumption of highly processed foods that contain not only “de-nutritionalized” ingredients but often also chemicals and various types of sweeteners
• Higher intakes of refined sugary and starchy foods
• Rapidly increasing serving and portion sizes

Often there are subsets of this type of diet, especially among health conscious young women:

• An obsession with purging all fat in the diet to its detrimental exclusion
• Vegetarianism with no attention to adequate protein, nor to actually eating vegetables
• High carbohydrate intake, especially as an attempt to substitute for fat intake, or also as a result of a vegetarian lifestyle
• Excessive and ongoing caloric restriction, often accompanied by episodes of bingeing on “forbidden” foods
• High consumption of caffeinated beverages, which can trigger increased perception of symptoms of hypoglycemia and consequently disordered eating, especially of carbohydrates
• Insufficient protein, fat, and/or calories to support an active lifestyle

how to eat

Most people consuming the type of diet above could benefit from making the following changes to their diet.

• Reducing intake of simple, refined, and highly processed carbs
• Eating more fruits and vegetables
• Increasing intake of soluble and insoluble fibre
• Reducing intake of bad fats: saturated fats from animal products and trans fats, usually found in highly processed foods, cooking sprays, and artificially solidified oils such as margarine
• Consuming sufficient quantities of good fats from fresh oils, nuts and seeds, oily fish, avocados, etc.
• Limiting portion sizes of calorie-dense foods specifically but also of meals in general

Now here’s the thing. These are principles, not specific instructions. These principles can be implemented in different ways depending on individual need.

A nutritional plan which says that everyone must eat exactly the same way all the time is not a good plan. Each person has different requirements, though just about everyone can think of a way that they can make positive changes in their nutritional plan.

Here are ways in which one can manipulate the role of carbs in their diet, from least to most dramatic.

1. Reducing sources of “junk food”: soda/pop, candy, sweetened baked goods like cake and cookies
2. Reducing sources of refined carbohydrates and sweeteners (read food labels! food manufacturers hide the stuff everywhere! it’s like cat hair… years after the cat dies you’re still picking fur off yourself)
3. Reducing and/or eliminating fruit juices, sugary sauces, white breads, white rice, white noodles
4. Looking at the glycemic index of the carbs that are eaten, and eating primarily low GI carbs
5. Eliminating all refined carbs entirely
6. Reducing overall carb intake to a moderate level, say 50-100 g daily
7. Cyclical change in carb intake, e.g. eating fewer for a set time, then more during a “carb-up” or “reefed”
8. Reducing carb intake to ketogenic levels, usually around 20-30 grams of carbs per day

how do i know what choices are right for me?

The easiest thing to do is start with the first type of change, which is reducing junk food in the diet. Quite likely after you get over the cravings from habitual use you will feel better. Remember that quite often, a craving does not represent an actual biological need. It represents a habitual pattern of use. Rip that bandaid off the junk food scab and don’t look back.

Then think about the following things.

Activity type. What kinds of activities do you habitually do? Are they endurance-based, strength-based, low-intensity, high-intensity, etc.? Endurance athletes generally need a higher carb intake. Also, consider timing your carbohydrate intake around your activity: consume the bulk of carbohydrates immediately before and after exercise.

Personal response to eating. After a big plate of pasta or a couple slices of bread, do you have the urge to snooze? Do you eat and eat without feeling satisfied? Or do you eat sporadically, alternately fasting and feasting? Research suggests that people vary in their carbohydrate tolerance as well as their response to changes in blood glucose. Ectomorphs (aka “beanpoles”, “Skinny Minnies” or “tall drinks of water”) typically do much better with a higher carbohydrate intake. Endomorphs (aka “built for comfort, not for speed”, “Weebles” or “sturdy”) typically benefit from lowering their carbohydrate intake and substituting a higher protein and fat intake. Mesomorphs (aka “those naturally muscular bastards”) are usually somewhere in the middle.

Blood sugar symptoms. Do you demonstrate symptoms of hypoglycemia? True hypoglycemia is rare but many of us exhibit symptoms that I would call “blood sugar issues”. When the brain perceives glucose levels falling it stimulates the sympathetic nervous system — the “fight or flight” system — which results in similar symptoms as a stress situation.  These can be things like faintness, irritability, the shakes, heart palpitations, or problems concentrating when blood sugar drops. Ever been really scared? And then the scary thing passes and you feel all weak and funny, maybe even a little nauseated? Same deal.  These symptoms doesn’t necessarily represent true hypoglycemia (although in diabetics they can precede full-blown hypoglycemia, often quite rapidly), but they’re correlated with cyclical changes in blood sugar. I sort of glaze over when I get really hungry and need to eat. I space out and get bitchier than normal. After a snack, I’m fine.

Family history. Do you have chronic diseases in your family history that are linked to blood sugar or insulin resistance problems? These can include obesity, thyroid disorders, polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), and diabetes.

Body composition. Are you lean? Normal? Overfat? Is your fat distributed more around your middle? If so you might be insulin resistant, although not only apple-shaped people are insulin resistant. The higher your bodyfat level, the greater the chances of you having or developing some form of insulin resistance and possibly even diabetes.

Appetite. What is your appetite like? Are you always hungry? Boy, I was when I was on the low fat, high carb diet. I thought about food constantly, and at night I would lie in bed listening to my tummy growl.

Personal medical history. Some medical conditions can change your responsiveness to insulin and thus require a lower carb approach. Two of the most common ones, as I have noted, are polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) and thyroid disease, but emerging research is showing that a lower carb diet can assist with many other chronic disorders, particularly those of an inflammatory nature such as IBS and rheumatoid arthritis.

You could benefit from further reducing your carb intake if you:

• are not doing large amounts of endurance based exercise
• get sleepy after a carb-rich meal
• demonstrate symptoms of blood sugar fluctuations
• have a family history or a personal medical history that includes Type II diabetes, blood sugar issues, obesity, PCOS, thyroid
• have difficulty controlling your appetite
• carry a lot of excess bodyfat
• have bodyfat which is preferentially distributed around your midsection (though other types of bodyfat deposition needn’t exclude you)

Even if you have all of these characteristics, you need not go fully ketogenic. There is a lot of middle ground between a high-carb and a low-carb diet. Macronutrient proportions can vary according to your individual preference and your response to them.

Refined carbs—processed sugars and simple starches—are still bad for you

No matter how you slice it (no pun intended), refined carbs are bad news. They’re essentially nutritional pollutants (one nutritionist refers to them as “fat fertilizer”), and they are found in most processed foods. They wreak havoc with your appetite and satiety, turn your blood sugar into a rollercoaster of highs and lows, and cause a variety of nasty things to happen throughout your body. I’m being a little hyperbolic, of course — one cookie isn’t going to make your liver shrivel, but when you start reading labels and realize how much junky crap is in your food, it’s a real wake-up call.

Here’s an example. This comes from a box of granola cereal. This cereal is marketed as “healthy” and “low in fat”. In fact, the slogan on the box reads “Good for You never tasted so good”. Supposedly it’s a “wholesome, crunchy multigrain blend”. Well! Wholesome! Low fat! No hydrogenated oil! Granola! Hippies like granola, right? So it must be awesome for me! Shazam!

And then reality hits like you like a warm wet baby diaper across the face. One serving is 2/3 cup. Go and measure out 2/3 of a cup of cereal. I would bet $20 that most people haven’t eaten a 2/3 cup serving of cereal in their lives, except to pass it as they keep on trucking to a 2-cup serving. This 2/3 cup serving has 220 calories, 3 grams of fat (well, at least they weren’t lying about that part), 4 grams of protein (eh, not great, but what can you expect — it’s not a steak cereal)… and 44 grams of carbs! The second ingredient is brown sugar. And just in case that wasn’t enough there’s also honey, y’know, a belt-and-suspenders kind of sweetener deal. Healthy, my ass.

One particular culprit is high fructose corn syrup. That stuff is everywhere: ketchup, juice, breakfast cereals. Read your labels! If there are more than, say, three ingredients and at least one of them ends in “ose”, don’t eat it, or restrict yourself to a small portion. White flour is also included as a refined carb, so limit your intake of this stuff too. Potatoes are often put into the refined carb group, although they are technically a vegetable. This is because they tend to stimulate a similar kind of response as other refined carbohydrates. But it’s a matter of degree: eating a baked potato is still much better than eating a pop tart.

refined carbs include:

Baked goods: muffins, donuts, pastries, cookies, cakes
White flour and white flour products such as white bread and bagels
Snack foods: candies, chips, pretzels
Sweetened dairy products: ice cream, chocolate milk
Drinks: pop/soda, juice
Processed grain products: Pasta made from white flour, white rice, rice cakes, many breakfast cereals

Remember: when you read the labels, look for the “ose” to denote a form of sugar, especially sucrose, glucose, and fructose, as well as their cousins maltose and dextrose. Think “OSE”: “Omigawd, Sugar Everywhere!”

For the geeks in the crowd, some reading material on glucose, fructose, weight gain, and the insulin resistance syndrome that notes, in part:

“The intake of dietary fructose has increased markedly as a result of the steady increase in added sugars in the American diet… In terms of feedback to the central nervous system (CNS) regarding energy status in peripheral tissues, fructose consumption results in decreased production and, therefore, decreased signaling to the CNS from 2 hormones (leptin and insulin) involved in the long-term regulation of energy homeostasis and body adiposity… Thus, the long-term consumption of diets high in fat and fructose is likely to lead to increased energy intake, weight gain, and obesity. The potential for weight gain from increased fructose consumption may only represent one aspect of its metabolic consequences.”

(Sharon S Elliott, Nancy L Keim, Judith S Stern, Karen Teff and Peter J Havel. Fructose, weight gain, and the insulin resistance syndrome. American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, 76(5): 911-922 (November 2002).)

By the way, many women have written me about polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), so I thought I would include a brief mention of it here. PCOS is characterized by several different symptoms, including higher than normal levels of circulating androgens, irregular menstruation, and persistent weight gain (or stubborn fat loss). It is correlated with insulin resistance and can be managed, in part, by weight training and a low carb diet (Glueck CJ, Papanna R, Wang P, Goldenberg N, Sieve-Smith L. “Incidence and treatment of metabolic syndrome in newly referred women with confirmed polycystic ovarian syndrome.” Metabolism. 52(7): 908-15 (July 2003).).

For more reading check out sites such as SoulCysters and PCOS Support.

Substitute whole grains and/or fruit and vegetables for refined carbs

Whole grains and fruit/veg are higher in beneficial fibre, vitamins, and in the case of fruit/veg, other useful phytonutrients (”phyto” = plant). This means that not only are they more nutritious in general, but they help control energy levels and appetite more effectively. Plus, they taste better! I give some ideas on the site about how to cook whole grains, useful if you have never incorporated them into your own cooking. The more you reduce your refined carb intake, the less you will probably crave the stuff. You’ll likely find that your appetite diminishes, and you have fewer blood sugar swings, but more consistent energy.

Folks concerned about inflammation and food intolerance might consider going one step further, and eliminating grains such as wheat from their diet altogether. Grains such as wheat and oats contain proteins known as lectins, which may interact with the gastrointestinal tract to cause local and systemic inflammation and an overactive immune system response. This can manifest itself as upset stomach symptoms along with a host of other autoimmune-type symptoms, such as eczema and rheumatoid arthritis. If this sounds familiar, check out the Paleo diet. But if you’re just starting out with this whole project, begin with small steps.

Some people will say that fruit should not be eaten while dieting, because fructose is easily converted to fat. This is a misconception. First, fruit is relatively low in fructose compared to things like high fructose corn syrups (HFCS). Fruit contains a mix of fructose and other sugars like glucose. HFCS is essentially a shot of pure sugar right into your veins, while fruit is much more slowly digested because of its fibre content.

Second, the amount of total sugar in fruit is very low. While the body lacks the ability to convert large quantities of fructose to muscle glycogen effectively, it would be very difficult to consume enough fructose in the form of fruit to make this happen. Compare:

8 oz orange juice: 110 calories, 27 g carbohydrate, maybe a bit of vitamin C. Oh yeah, and some glucose-fructose.

1 orange: 62 calories, 15 g carbohydrate, 3 g fibre, 116% of daily RDA for vitamin C plus a ton of vitamins, minerals and other phytonutrients. Nothing else.

Fruit has an important place in a well balanced diet, no matter what your goals are. It’s loaded with vitamins and fibre, and it tastes great!

Lowcarb diets are not magical

They work in large part by inhibiting appetite (largely through their effects on regulatory hormones) and lowering calories. Total caloric intake is the prime determinant of weight loss. It’s just that many folks find that lowering carb intake also reduces their appetite, so they eat less. Or, because they’re told they should restrict a food group, they eat less. In any case, they’re eating fewer calories.

There is evidence that diets lower in carbohydrate do seem to work better than diets low in fat for both weight loss and improving overall health indicators (e.g. blood chemistry), and that people may not need to restrict calories quite so much when restricting carbohydrate, because of the ways in which the body handles the different macronutrients. Generally, one of the first things I do is have clients cut way down on their carb intake, simply because most people eat too many carbs to support their levels of activity, and they eat a lot of sugary and starchy junk. For the average person, just cutting out the foods in the “eat less” column below will produce noticeable results.

Personally, I strongly recommend clients and trainees cut way down on carbs, simply because the average North American eats so much. When they cut out the junk and focus on consuming whole unprocessed foods, good fats, plenty of lean protein, and heaps of vegetables and fruit, a lot of this just takes care of itself. No carb-free bread required.

It’s the calories, stupid

This bears repeating. Any diet that involves you eating fewer calories than you burn will result in weight loss. Any diet that includes eating more calories than you burn will result in weight gain. Nobody’s body breaks the laws of physics. It just looks that way sometimes, because we haven’t accurately calculated or understood some part of the equation. Some people report eating more on a lower-carb diet and still losing fat — great. It doesn’t mean their bodies have violated the rules of the universe; it just means that their systems are handling the nutrients in a particular way that isn’t exactly comparable to a different macronutrient ratio. If they kept on eating more and more and more, regardless of what that “more” was, eventually it’d catch up.

Now, the quality of that weight loss, and how you feel while doing it, depends on your macronutrient intake. How your body handles the calories it takes in will depend on your activity levels and your ability to effectively use the carbs you do ingest.

But in general, a diet which has adequate lean protein, good fats, adequate fibre, and lots of fruit and veggies is the best choice for general health for the average person. The actual percentages will vary from person to person, depending on individual needs, but this plan is a good basic overview.

Cutting carbs drastically is not appropriate for everyone

No diet, no matter how great it is, is a one-size-fits-all prescription. People doing lots of endurance activity will likely find their performance decreases when carbs dip too low, as will people trying to gain muscle. Carbs, especially good carbs, have a role to play in a balanced diet which is sustainable for the long term. In addition, even people who aren’t very good with carbs can benefit from timing carb intake around their workouts.

Most folks can benefit from reducing the amount of refined sugars and starches they eat, but cutting down drastically on good quality carbs is not necessarily always the best thing for everyone.

Well, at the end of it all in early 1997, I was still overweight. Desperately, I tried to purge every last living fat molecule from my life. I sautéed veggies in water. I ate pasta with plain tomato sauce.

I hovered over my husband when he cooked, making sure he didn’t try to infringe on my fat-free life with an extra blop of cooking oil. I even tried going vegetarian, but had to quit that after a couple of weeks when my tummy growled constantly with hunger. And through it all, I happily scarfed “fat-free” treats: Snackwells, hard candies, Jello, gelatos and sorbets, fat-free salad dressings with a weird chemical aftertaste…

Are you doing the math by now, dear reader? It wasn’t the fat in my diet that was the problem, it was the carbohydrate intake. In other words, I had replaced some negligible fat calories with tons of sugar and starch calories.

When I discovered weight training, I discovered that bodybuilders ate strangely. They ate lots of lean protein, avoided simple sugar and starch carbs like white bread, pasta, and white rice, and (gasp!) deliberately ate fat! I thought they were all insane. I began training, but kept eating my fat-free, high-carb diet. I was doing OK in the gym thanks to beginner gains, but I sure wasn’t losing any fat. I started to think I was destined to be heavy. Most of the women in my family are “pleasingly plump”. I figured it was genetics. I figured I was a lost cause. I got pretty depressed about the prospect. Then my training guru told me I wasn’t eating enough protein, and suggested supplementing with flax seed oil. I thought it was the craziest thing I’d ever heard. Eat fat on purpose?! But, after a few weeks of him nagging me to do it, I gave in and bought my first bottle of flax seed oil. (by the way, you can read more about why you shouldn’t drop your fat intake when dieting, and about flax seed oil here). And I started cutting back on plain pasta in favour of lean protein. With almost no other effort on my part besides regular visits to the gym, the fat began dropping off.

So, what was the reason for this transformation? Why is a diet low in carbs conducive to losing fat? Let’s start with an explanation of why simple carbs (sugars and starches) have more of a role to play in fat deposition than dietary fat.

Carbohydrates are one of the three main groups of macronutrients in the diet (the other two are fat and protein). In the carb group are various kinds of sugars such as sucrose (table sugar), fructose (fruit sugar), lactose (in milk), and so forth, as well as various kinds of starches, which are composed of sugar molecules bonded together. Our bodies use glucose, one of the very simplest sugar molecules, as a main source of fuel.

The closer something is to glucose, the more quickly it is digested and used as fuel. Simple sugars are very easily digested and converted to glucose. Starches are somewhat harder for the body to convert to glucose, so it has to expend a bit more effort doing so. Refined starches such as white flour, white rice, cornstarch, and products such as breakfast cereals, white bread, and pasta made with these refined starches, are easier for the body to convert to glucose than starches from whole grains (barley, oatmeal) and vegetables (except for potatoes and yams). Because more complex carbs such as whole grains and vegetables contain more fibre, they are not as readily broken down by the body, and so do not as quickly become glucose. (By the way, fructose is not converted in the same way as glucose. Thus some people claim that substances such as high-fructose corn syrup are actually “good” for you, because they don’t raise glucose levels rapidly. This is BS. Sugar is sugar is sugar.)

In addition, complex carbs contain other things like vitamins and minerals which are often missing in refined carbs because of their extensive processing. Have you ever noticed that white breads trumpet how vitamin- and mineral-enriched they are? Did you ever wonder why breadmakers had to put those things back into the product? It’s because they took them out in the first place!

OK, so why is it important to think about how quickly foods get converted to glucose? For one thing, the human body is a very thrifty machine. It constantly worries that we may encounter a time when we do not have enough to eat, so it socks fuel away for a rainy (or hungry) day. This was a great idea when we were running around trying not to get et by sabre-toothed tigers while scavenging for edible roots, but not as brilliant for our modern industrialized lifestyles where food is as close as a quick stumble to the fridge. It’s the reason why starvation is a really long, drawn-out death: the body has quite extensive resources to deal with food shortages.

When we have an excess of glucose gushing into our bloodstream, as happens with the consumption of simple and refined carbs, our body handles it in two ways. One way is to excrete glucose through the urine, though this is only used if the body cannot deal with the excess glucose, as in the case of diabetics. In most people, the body’s main technique is to store excess glucose as fat. Let me repeat that in case you didn’t catch it. It stores excess sugar as fat. Are you making the connection now? It’s probably not the fat in your diet that’s making you fat, it’s more likely the sugar.

When metabolizing glucose, the body releases insulin from the pancreas. Insulin causes the glucose to move into the cells so that it may be processed. If the cells don’t need all that glucose for their various functions, then they convert the glucose to triglycerides (fats), and store the fat within the cells, organs, or in adipose (fat) tissue. In the process of sending the fat molecules to their destination (mostly adipose tissue), the fat molecules are moved through the bloodstream. You end up with fat roaming around in your blood, which (along with the inflammatory cascade precipitated by abundant blood sugar) eventually spells cardiovascular problems, such as heart disease and stroke, as well as an eventual increase in bodyfat. “Bad” fats made from sugars can also interfere with “good” fats such as those from flax seed oils, which prevents the “good” fats from doing their job.

But the diabolical work of simple and refined sugars doesn’t end there. These kinds of carbs, as I said, are digested very quickly. There is a rush of glucose into the body’s systems. The body responds by releasing insulin, which because it shoves the glucose into the cells, results in a blood sugar drop. Many refer to this quick blood sugar rush and resulting drop as an “insulin spike” (a friend of mine refers to a particular kind of sugar-saturated donut as “The Insulin Whiplash”). It’s like a sugar rollercoaster. People who are sensitive to this may feel shaky, fatigued, dizzy, faint, and/or sleepy after consuming these kinds of carbs in significant amounts. More extreme symptoms of hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) include depression, mood swings, and even unconsciousness. A chocolate bar may give you quick energy with the flood of glucose into your system, but your energy levels will drop through the floor 30 minutes or so later. And here is where the vicious cycle completes itself: you’re left craving more simple and refined carbs. It’s like a nutritional perpetual motion machine. Eat more simple carbs, desire more simple carbs. Which, of course, spells F-A-T.

It’s ironic that our problems with sugar are largely a result of industrialization and class snobbishness. It used to be that the refinement of foods was something that only the middle and upper classes could afford. Only peasants ate dark whole grain breads and picked their food from the fields. Milady and milud did not soil their digestive systems with such low-class things! Maybe a better diet was the working-class revenge which Marx envisioned! Now many kinds of good-for-you foods are classified as “health foods” and only the privileged can afford to buy them at specialty shops, while refined foods like white bread and Twinkies are some of the cheapest foods one can buy.

Does all of this mean that sugar is the enemy? Well, yes and no. Yes, we should be very conscious of our simple and refined carb intake when trying to lose fat. But if we make informed food choices, then carbs are relegated to their proper place of reliable energy source. How can we do this?

Choose fibrous, complex carbs over simple, refined carbs. So, eat brown rice instead of white, and whole wheat pasta instead of regular pasta. And if you can, cut back on the sugar you put into your coffee. Two spoonfuls of sugar, twice a day, add up to a lot of extra carbs over a long time. Combined with caffeine’s tendency to drop your blood sugar, and you have hypoglycemia city.

Change the way you structure your meals. It used to be that a healthy meal had some protein (usually as meat), some starch (potatoes, rice, pasta, etc.), and some veggies on the side. I suggest getting rid of the starch altogether and increasing the portions of lean protein and veggies. For example, one of the things I love to do is make a big salad with all kinds of veggies (and sometimes even fruit and/or nuts and seeds), and toss some chopped cooked chicken or steak into it. Or, I make curries with chopped chicken or beef, some chopped veggies, and maybe some chickpeas. Instead of a tuna sandwich on bread, I throw some tuna in a bowl and mix it with some mayo, chopped tomatoes and green peppers, and maybe some sunflower seeds. You’re only limited by your creativity.

Eat more regularly. If you eat two or three times a day, it means that your blood sugar undergoes more fluctuations, which can mean less energy and more readily deposited bodyfat. If, on the other hand, you eat five or six small meals a day, and these meals have some protein and fat in them (in other words, I don’t mean that a meal is a handful of fig newtons!), then your blood sugar remains more constant, you’ll have fewer cravings, more energy, and generally feel better. Plus your metabolism will keep revving because your body has to expend the effort to digest stuff more frequently.

Learn to read labels to look for hidden sources of sugar. Soft drinks and fruit juices are loaded with sugar. If you must drink pop, at least switch to diet (and this is a temporary solution; try switching to soda water instead of consuming all the chemicals in diet pop). Other serious sources of sugar are pastries (cookies, pies, Twinkies, etc.), candy, many processed and canned foods such as sauces (ketchup, peanut butter, syrups of all kinds), juices, and fruits, and dairy products such as flavoured yogurts or ice cream. Most breakfast cereals are pure junk from a simple carb standpoint. They might as well call Cheerios “Gluc-Os”. You’d be amazed at what contains simple and refined carbs, so read the labels on everything!!

Finally, and this is a corollary of the first thing, learn about the glycemic index. The glycemic index (GI) is a representation of how readily foods are converted to glucose in your body. So, simple and refined sugars have the highest GI, while fibrous, fat- or protein-rich foods have much lower GIs. The body has to work harder to convert more complex carbs, protein, and fat to glucose. Choosing foods that have lower GIs will help prevent the dreaded “insulin whiplash” since their slower conversion means less of a glucose rush. It’s not a perfect list — again, fructose appears to have a low GI, for example. But it does correlate decently well to which foods are whole foods, and which foods are highly processed, low-fibre foods.

In conclusion, just because something is “fat-free” may not mean it’s good for you. “Fat-free” foods are often very high in simple and refined carbs, which means that in your body, they’re as far from “fat-free” as you can get.

Food is generally regarded by bodybuilders not as an experience of organic and sensual enjoyment, but as fuel or a substance which contributes to the achievement of a particular physical goal. Bodyfat, in “fitness culture”, is the physical manifestation of overindulgence. Eating, for many people in this culture, is something to be brought under control, and to be done within a clearly defined regimen of bodily discipline.

Enjoyment of food and control of the body are thought to be incompatible; after all, who gets brown rice and lentil cravings? Thus, if the pleasure of eating is antithetical to control of the body, it stands to reason that foods deemed appropriate for “health” goals must be-symbolically or actually-separate from those kinds of foods which are enjoyable. “For”, as Margaret Morse notes, “if food is the manna of fullness and pleasure, nonfood is bad-tasting medicine that-precisely because it is disgusting-can be eaten with pleasure…”(145)

While the latest nonfood supplements such as flavoured whey protein or protein bars taste better than their predecessors, the very fact that they are now supposed to be tasty (or at least palatable) only reinforces the notion that they are “healthy” substitutes for the “unhealthy” real thing. The flavour list of ProMax’s protein bars, for example, reads like a dessert menu: apple pie, raspberry truffle, chocolate fudge brownie. These bars are a morally superior stand-in for “forbidden” foods, and in fact become preferable to the real thing. One may indulge one’s sensual appetites through “virtual flavour” with no physical “harm” being done. Like Olestra, these nonfood products provide a simulacrum of food.

Ironically, it is the most processed foods that are most likely to trumpet their “improved” health value. Some years back, Maple Leaf Foods in Canada promoted a hot dog product by emphasizing its vitamin content. This state of affairs might stem from our cultural “loss of faith in our ability to survive a toxic natural and social world without medicinal help” (Morse 147), and the symbolic link between technology and the future of “progress”. Bodybuilders are always searching for the next big thing, the newest substance to give them an edge over their competitors. The democratic nature of access to “real” food allows nonfood to have a cachet of scientific sophistication. And, we think, the more engineered the food, the better it must be for us. We can bypass all that inconvenient nutrient conversion and jam those isolated aminos straight into our cells.

Personally I feel that we cannot improve on real food. One square of real dark chocolate beats the snot out of a whole fake flavoured “chocolate brownie” protein bar any day. Some of the “delicious” supplements taste downright awful. Real food has sustained us for thousands of years, we’ve gotten very inventive at preparing it in delicious and nourishing ways, and it contains everything we need to survive and thrive. Also, there is a near-complete lack of genuine nutrition in prefab crud. Although the manufacturer may have shoved a handful of vitamins in there like a cook shoves stuffing up a turkey’s butt, the chemical soup of fake food resembles a waste dump more than a meal.

However I do like the convenience of protein bars. So, I decided to use my simian brain and the Julia Child spirit and come up with one myself. And aside from the fact that it’s “real food”, it’s also a whole lot cheaper per bar.

Bordo, Susan. “Anorexia Nervosa: Psychopathology as Crystallization of Culture”, Food and Culture: A Reader ed. Carole Counihan and Penny van Esterik (New York: Routledge, 1997).

Morse, Margaret. “What Do Cyborgs Eat? Oral Logic in an Information Society”, Virtualities: Television, Media Art, and Cyberculture. Bloomington: Indiana University Press, 1998.