Comments on: Rant 6 December 2002: Magic machines and gift horses http://www.stumptuous.com/12-2002-magic-machines-and-gift-horses Mon, 06 Feb 2012 17:03:58 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 By: Esther http://www.stumptuous.com/12-2002-magic-machines-and-gift-horses/comment-page-1#comment-7202 Esther Thu, 27 Oct 2011 10:25:21 +0000 #comment-7202 Wow - beautiful 'Nobody has yet invented a perpetual motion machine, but your heart is able to beat and beat and beat and beat, millions of times a year, every year of your life. Our bones are stronger than most artificially created materials, including concrete. We can sneeze at over 100 miles per hour. Bodies six feet tall and hundreds of pounds can balance on two relatively tiny little feet, an accomplishment which has yet to be replicated by robot builders. There are many more factoids like this about the human body, which reveal it as a wonder of engineering.' Can't argue with that. Maybe I should change my tone about the persisting flabby bits on my tummy and thighs after my baby's birth - maybe a bit more respect and gratitude from me will get me and my body both where we want to go :) And yeah, talk about making it all about one thing! Geez Esther. Wow – beautiful

‘Nobody has yet invented a perpetual motion machine, but your heart is able to beat and beat and beat and beat, millions of times a year, every year of your life. Our bones are stronger than most artificially created materials, including concrete. We can sneeze at over 100 miles per hour. Bodies six feet tall and hundreds of pounds can balance on two relatively tiny little feet, an accomplishment which has yet to be replicated by robot builders. There are many more factoids like this about the human body, which reveal it as a wonder of engineering.’

Can’t argue with that. Maybe I should change my tone about the persisting flabby bits on my tummy and thighs after my baby’s birth – maybe a bit more respect and gratitude from me will get me and my body both where we want to go :) And yeah, talk about making it all about one thing! Geez Esther.

]]> By: Elizabeth http://www.stumptuous.com/12-2002-magic-machines-and-gift-horses/comment-page-1#comment-191 Elizabeth Mon, 23 Feb 2009 03:30:30 +0000 #comment-191 <i>If our bodies could speak to us, what would they say? For many of us, they would probably say something like, “Stop abusing me, you dumbshit, I’m trying to do my job here!”</i> This is exactly the experience I've been having for the past few months: my body is bitching me out hardcore about the way I've been treating it, and ordering me around. It's become impossible to ignore, which is quite an experience -- rather like being possessed by the spirit of a very cranky personal trainer. "Stop drinking so much, you damn lush, I'm sick of being hungover and fat." "Eat some vegetables, for the LOVE of CHRIST." "If you don't start doing back hyperextensions now, I am going to crack in half at the waist." "Move. No, more. No, MORE. MOVE. OW. MOVE." "Quit with the aspartame already. I don't even know what this shit <i>is</i>, much less what I'm supposed to do with it." "OM NOM NOM NOM" (translation: "I need protein so badly I've started talking like a lolcat, HALP") I'm doing the things it says even as the contradictory messages run circles around my brain, because I'm pretty sure my body knows better, and also because its messages are so strong that my brain can only wring its hands and fret helplessly in the background. It's a very <i>vivid</i> illustration of the mind/body divide (your crackpot theories about which you should totally share) and if I could bottle whatever started it I would make millions. If our bodies could speak to us, what would they say? For many of us, they would probably say something like, “Stop abusing me, you dumbshit, I’m trying to do my job here!”

This is exactly the experience I’ve been having for the past few months: my body is bitching me out hardcore about the way I’ve been treating it, and ordering me around. It’s become impossible to ignore, which is quite an experience — rather like being possessed by the spirit of a very cranky personal trainer.

“Stop drinking so much, you damn lush, I’m sick of being hungover and fat.”

“Eat some vegetables, for the LOVE of CHRIST.”

“If you don’t start doing back hyperextensions now, I am going to crack in half at the waist.”

“Move. No, more. No, MORE. MOVE. OW. MOVE.”

“Quit with the aspartame already. I don’t even know what this shit is, much less what I’m supposed to do with it.”

“OM NOM NOM NOM” (translation: “I need protein so badly I’ve started talking like a lolcat, HALP”)

I’m doing the things it says even as the contradictory messages run circles around my brain, because I’m pretty sure my body knows better, and also because its messages are so strong that my brain can only wring its hands and fret helplessly in the background. It’s a very vivid illustration of the mind/body divide (your crackpot theories about which you should totally share) and if I could bottle whatever started it I would make millions.

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